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Thread: DWD Log

  1. #1

    DWD Log

    Hello there. I am new to this forum. I've tried (but not so hard) to find a forum about depression but the few I lurked in made more depressed. To be honest, this time I haven't read many posts in this forum but I still like it. My coping mechanism caused my to fall into deep depression to the point I do not get out of my house for months and when I do get out, another episode starts and worst than the last one. I really don't have anyone to listen, understand, or respect what I am going through and I no longer able to hear any advice from my family or anyone who might think himself wise enough to tell me what I should and should not do or what I am missing by staying home. since I was little I was a confrontational person. I tend to hide thinking I am being polite but it was considered to be weak and stupid and led to more sarcasm from my family. In the past years I tried to listen to people like Tony Robbins and Jim Rohan but I was not applying much of what I hear and of course that led to more depression. Sometimes it feels like what is it good for to change or do any effort, their not gonna change the way they treating me. (That's seeking other's affirmation and approval. Waiting for them to believe in me and respect me). I got now to the point that I do hate myself and the place I live and every thing. Every day has been a struggle to survive without have another episode and a struggle to do daily routine and chores.

    Could it be my high expectations? I expect them to be what I want them to be! I didn't learn to accept them the way they are and my pride prevent me from accepting the fact that I've been failure all a long.

    There's much to be said espcially that the episodes of depressions hits my very often and it is becoming worse. I can not afford to go to a therapist so I will try to write here and read a book about depression.

  2. #2
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome to DWD. Can I ask where you are?
    “You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
    - Jon Kabat-Zinn

  3. #3
    Guardian of the North and kipper holder Angie's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome to DWD

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi View Post
    Hi and welcome to DWD. Can I ask where you are?
    I am in Egypt, @Suzi. How are you?

    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi View Post
    Hi and welcome to DWD. Can I ask where you are?
    Hello Angie. Thank you. How are you today?
    Last edited by Suzi; 26-08-17 at 09:12 PM. Reason: Merging 2 posts. Please don't double post within minutes! :)

  5. #5
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    I'm not quite sure how medical stuff works in Eygpt. Can you get to see a Dr and tell them everything?
    “You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
    - Jon Kabat-Zinn

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Butterfly00 View Post
    I am in Egypt, @Suzi. How are you?



    Hello Angie. Thank you. How are you today?
    Neither do I, Suzi. I can not afford it anyway. I am gonna have to deal with it on my own.

  7. #7
    Little things, little actions from people around me triggers a lot of negative thoughts and self hate. I do hate living here with those people but yet I can not leave. I am still learning to deal with those feelings and with self-hate.

  8. #8
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    . What people? Are you talking about family? Friends? Colleagues?
    I believe if you wear enough pretty lipstick, sparkly jewellery and great shoes, no one will notice the size of your ass

  9. #9
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
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    Do you have anywhere else to go?
    “You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
    - Jon Kabat-Zinn

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Butterfly00 View Post
    Little things, little actions from people around me triggers a lot of negative thoughts and self hate. I do hate living here with those people but yet I can not leave. I am still learning to deal with those feelings and with self-hate.
    Family!

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