Setback *Triggers* *SU SH triggers*

[JustEM]

And thanks for asking Magie, my tummy is much better now!

[Suzi]

Are you worrying about your parents and what they have going on? Could that be a factor in your mood? Do you have lots of things planned for this week?

[magie06]

I'm tired this evening. And I don't feel like I did very much today. However, Strictly is on now and my feet are up!

[JustEM]

Not to sound harsh, but I'm not really worrying about them. They bicker yeah, but I know they're okay really. So I don't think that's affected my mood.

Think I over-did it last week and had a suggestion of cold symptoms. Being tired always has a bad affect on my mood. Then I saw the reality of how little help I have received and am currently 'receiving' from the MH team. There's always talk of lots of support but nothing actually comes into place.

There was the huge build up to hospital, then I got through that with the support of my family and the hospital staff and you guys and my own strength and positivity, and now I'm discharged nobody is even monitoring my weight or anything. It's like three weeks of tube feeding and I'm fixed haha!

But I've accepted it's the way it is with the system. Recovery comes from within. I don't need the MH team, but can't help feel like I've slipped through the net a bit. So feeling a bit unwanted because of that paired with the tiredness has caused my mood to dip.

I've also convinced myself I won't get a job interview. Guess I just need a pick me up.

[Paula]

I forgot to add! My parents, in terms of being a support, are incredible. I'm so grateful for them.

But really, they're struggling. We all are. My dad hates his job and everything is fixated on that. He can be a real misery because of it but he won't do anything about it. I think he actually kind of likes and hates the job if that makes sense?

My mother is going through the menopause bless her. She's emotional anyways, but it's more so more. So they pick at each other and snap and sulk a bit. It's never anything bad, but it doesn't take much for one of us to get stressed, upset or on the defensive.

I’m dreading the menopause. Hormonal issues have always be a trigger for a MH crisis for me and I can’t take HRT as the doctors reckon that would be a trigger too. Having seen my mum go through it (twice, it’s a long story) and how ill and unhappy it made her, every woman that goes through it deserves all the sympathy in the world imho

[Suzi]

Twice? Your poor Mum!

I think that you've been completely let down by the MH team to be fair. They don't seem to have been particularly active in getting you any help and support since you've been home and that's not good enough. Being in hospital is really tough, but being home seems so much harder - especially when the initial "I'm home and I can do this...." seems to wear off. You need and deserve better support. I hope you are fighting for it and letting your Mum help too.

If you're really tired what about a couple of rest days?

[Paula]

Twice, yes. She had a hysterectomy (uterus only) at 32. After a few years her ovaries decided not to bother working anymore and she went through menopause in her early 40s. But, in her late 50s, she started having symptoms again and they reckon her ovaries had decided to start working again and carried on until she got to her natural age to go through the menopause.

[Suzi]

Ouch that's horrible!

How are you doing lovely?

[JustEM]

Ohh I'm really sorry to hear that, Paula. That sounds like it was horrible for your mum.
I see my mother getting through it by letting her emotions out, accepting that it's the menopause, taking lots of relaxing bubble baths and eating plenty of chocolate! She can't take any tablets for it either.

[JustEM]

Hey Suzi!

Yeah, the MH team haven't been great at all. I'm not going to fight it anymore to make people care though. I'd much rather gratefully accept the good support I have and am receiving.

I had a really busy day with my mam yesterday which was lovely but after it, I'm just exhausted! Bed at 9pm last night, slept solid until 8.30am, was up for half hour and fell asleep til Midday. Now I can feel myself falling into a nap again! If I'm tired, I let myself rest.

I weighed myself today and I'm only a few pounds heavier than when I was admitted and a little lighter than what I was when I was discharged. Which is weird. Bizarre as my head continues to tell me otherwise.

Mood is still flat as a pancake. Can't even be bothered to paint which so isn't me!

No job news yet. I need to stop obsessively looking. It only reinforces the negative feelings.

How are you? How's Crash?