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Thread: Setback *Triggers* *SU SH triggers*

  1. #341
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Maybe your day was lovely as the decision about hospital has been made and it isn't hanging over you as a threat or something really negative? I'm not surprised you are worried about the hospital lovely.
    That chutney sounds delicious!

    Any news on when you're going in?
    “You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
    - Jon Kabat-Zinn

  2. #342
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Any news, sweetie?
    I believe if you wear enough pretty lipstick, sparkly jewellery and great shoes, no one will notice the size of your ass

  3. #343
    Hi ladies!

    Yeah, it doesn't feel like a threat now and I'm accepting it because if I refused they would section me and I don't need that, obviously!

    Still nervous though. Bit worried about being alone there and having the tube up the nose and such. It's okay though....

    Playing the waiting game again today. No news. Packed up my paints ready but I need to keep busy so I'm going to make more chutney for my stall.

    Fiery carrot chutney and then a rustic tomato chutney with chilli, fresh basil and chives. They'll be delicious by Christmas time and I'll be ready to eat them by then, too!!

    Thanks for checking in on how I'm doing xx

  4. #344
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Those sound amazingly delicious!
    You are sounding more positive about it lovely - have you spoken it all over with your Mum?
    “You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
    - Jon Kabat-Zinn

  5. #345
    Moderator of Awesomeness magie06's Avatar
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    You sound a lot more positive today. Well done I know it can't be easy. Your chutney's sound lovely. (Or for someone who likes chilli and spices they would be delicious, but I only like 'plain food'.)

  6. #346
    Chutney making went out the window! Aw the hotter the better for me, Magie!

    Got a call that a bed is available. Initially said I couldn't go but after a sob and talk to my mam, I know the best option is to just go in rather than prolonging it so we're on the way.

    Wish it hadn't got to this but sooner I'm in sooner I'm out.

  7. #347
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Good luck gorgeous. I'm so proud of you for taking this opportunity to get well.. We'll be with you in spirit and thoughts love.. You are amazing. You can do this.
    “You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
    - Jon Kabat-Zinn

  8. #348
    Moderator of Awesomeness magie06's Avatar
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    You better keep us informed or we will be all over the internet looking for you.

  9. #349
    Thank you so much!!

    Well, I'm finally here in hospital! The tube was a totally horrible experience. I initially refused out of fear because of memories of having it as a young child, but my dad was with me and despite being awfully squeemish, he was amazing! The staff are all so kind, reassuring and helpful. I'm staying in a nice ward with three quiet old ladies and a nice sea view. There are two day rooms where I can paint and visiting is all day from 12pm-8pm.

    I was very emotional with my dad just now. I think it was all the emotions of this last year hitting me at once with the fear and feeling that hospital was a threat hanging over me and the sheer relief that the tube got passed and that hospital is not a jail sentence! I looked at myself in the mirror tonight with my gaunt face, feeding tube and mobile stand pumping juice into me and couldn't believe it has come to this.

    This is end of the road anorexia, you know? And I realised that from here the only way is UP. It's still very surreal and I cant quite believe I'm here.

    I'm feeling exhausted. I think I will be asleep soon and I hope I will feel more settled, accepting and fresher in the morning.

    I hope all is as well as it can be with you lovely ladies.

    Take care and thank you xxx

  10. #350
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Sweetheart, I hope you know that we all think you’re truly wonderful and brave and so deserving of a great life. This is just a means to an end, it’s just a temporary blip in your story. You’re going to get better and will go on to do absolutely incredible things with your life
    I believe if you wear enough pretty lipstick, sparkly jewellery and great shoes, no one will notice the size of your ass

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