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Thread: Hi from me

  1. #1

    Hi from me

    Hi

    I'm struggling recently and have been diagnosed with depression. I feel down occasionally but can usually pick myself up but this time it won't work.

    Holding a conversation is difficult without crying for no reason. Feel dead inside but emotional at the same time. Can't understand it.

    Having a few issues with work, family illness, relationship, lots Of other things and it's just not working anymore.
    My sleep has been rubbish and my appetite has gone so I've lost 10kg in about 3 weeks. (Not healthy). I'm a really logical guy and that's stopped working and have turned to being horrible and verbally aggressive with people.

    My doctor has now signed me off but I'm struggling with talking to people about it so I thought I'd try here. I tried to organise councilling for myself but they don't have any room until about a month away because I have a trip away.

    It's really difficult for me (as will be for others) because I'm usually the level headed one and now I'm just a bit broken.

    I'll post about some other stuff later but just thought I'd introduce myself.

    Bobbo

  2. #2
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Hi Bobbo and welcome. You made me smile as you are a lot more understanding of how you feel than you think. Well done for going to the Dr. Other than signing you off, what treatment and/or support did they offer? Can I suggest you make the appt for counselling? A month isn't that long and at least you know you have that happening

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  3. The Following User Says Thank You to Paula For This Useful Post:

    Bobbo (19-06-17)

  4. #3
    I've already arranged the councilling through an independant service that my work offers. It's just a shame I'm away on holiday for a bit as I could really do with having someone to vent to. They have a 24 hour phone service with councillors if I want but I'm more of a face to face kind of person. The woman I spoke to on the phone before just sounded like a wee old lady that had seen councilling on films (how did that make you feel etc.)
    I'm determined to give it a good go though, afterall you don't stop eating if you go to a bad restaurant, you go elsewhere.

    I'm pretty self aware most of the time and know when I've been unreasonable but it doesn't stop me feeling like that. I'm most aware when I snap at my daughter because I feel terrible about it.

    When I went to see the doctor he told me instantly that I wasn't going back to work for a while. He also gave me some material but was not sure whether to medicate me at the time.
    He gave me some sleeping pills to try and help me get some rest as a starter then I see him again in a couple of weeks and we'll make a decision then about what to do.

    I just know I don't want to feel like this anymore.

  5. #4
    Sorry.... Forgot to say thank you. That was rude of me.

  6. #5
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome. That sounds like a really good start!
    Tn prdu, jhami s rcbro

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    Bobbo (19-06-17)

  8. #6
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome.
    You mention your daughter - how old is she? Do you have a good relationship with her? Who else do you have for support?


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  9. #7
    My daughter is 3.5ish. Yes, I have a great relationship with her and she's just awesome.
    My support network is a bit broken as they are part of my issues&stresses and I can't rely on them at the moment.

    My best mate has been through some dark times and I've spoken to him a couple of times, but he's a busy man. It was after speaking to him that I decided to go to the doctors in the first place.

  10. #8
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    I'm so glad you spoke to him and went to speak to your Dr. Can you try keeping a mood diary just to keep a note and then take that with you to go and see your Dr. Remember, you don't have to wait those 2 weeks....


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    Bobbo (19-06-17)

  12. #9
    I do need to wait the two weeks unfortunately. It's the day I get back from holiday (that I leave for tomorrow)
    That's not exactly been the easiest thing to look forward to either. It's the whole of my other half's family that we're going with and all the kids for her Dad's big birthday.
    I've kept how I've been feeling from them and now I'm going to be thrust into close proximity with them for the entire time. I just don't want to ruin their holiday and make it all about me. I'd hate to do that to them, but if they notice they'll try to get involved which I just don't need at the moment.
    I'm usually a really outgoing (loud) guy that gets involved in everything and eats a tonne. They already suspect something's not right but they are going to pick up on it straight away when we are away because when I am hungry now (rarely) I can barely force down half a meal without my stomach going into cramps. I'm just not ready to deal with them yet.

  13. #10
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Could you talk it over with your OH? Maybe come up with some exit strategies? Surely you aren't going to have to be together all of the time? Maybe have an evening or a day away from each other or something?


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