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Thread: I need a bit of a confidence boost *trigger*

  1. #141
    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi View Post
    Are you sure that's reality or is it how you perceive it?
    What other way is there to explain it?

  2. #142
    Hero Member rose's Avatar
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    It might have a lot more to do with the people you know, than you specifically. Could that be possible?

  3. #143
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    It's something my husband has been working through with the new mh team - it's whether things really are as he thinks they are.. Generally they aren't - it's "just" that he perceives some one to be behaving/acting in a specific way...
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  4. #144
    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi View Post
    It's something my husband has been working through with the new mh team - it's whether things really are as he thinks they are.. Generally they aren't - it's "just" that he perceives some one to be behaving/acting in a specific way...
    Id thats the case then ic had a very long chain of bad luck

  5. #145
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    IT's got nothing to do with luck. My husband is one of the most amazing people I've ever met. He's had so much to deal with since he was a baby... It's about working what his triggers are, where his issues really lie (mostly his zero amount of self esteem) and that's so hard. I'd ask you to not be so flippant please..
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  6. #146
    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi View Post
    IT's got nothing to do with luck. My husband is one of the most amazing people I've ever met. He's had so much to deal with since he was a baby... It's about working what his triggers are, where his issues really lie (mostly his zero amount of self esteem) and that's so hard. I'd ask you to not be so flippant please..
    Im not being flippant. Im making no comment about you or your husband. But when similar things have been happening with people throughout my life its difficult to believe its anything external.

  7. #147
    Hero Member rose's Avatar
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    I think a person with low self-esteem can get int the habit of attracting the wrong people and clinging to people who do them no good. When that person needs a bit of support then guess what - all those people we have supported and considered your friends are nowhere to be seen.

    I have friends who will never ask me how I am, I've learnt to really reduce people like that in my life and only keep the ones who genuinely make my life better even if they are not great friends. I did spend alot of energy on people like that in the past. Now, I have people who care and ask after me, the number of those people has increased, actually since I stated being more honest about my struggles. Perhaps admitting I am not perfect has made me more likable. I try harder with people but I am more ruthless too.

    So, what this post is trying to say is, that good people are out there and you deserve good friendships, but you have to let yourself have them, and stay away from (or decrease the number of) people who aren't good friends.

  8. #148
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The_Scientist View Post
    Im not being flippant. Im making no comment about you or your husband. But when similar things have been happening with people throughout my life its difficult to believe its anything external.
    Thank you. The thing is as we grow older our friendship circles change and it seems that naturally those friends around us change too. I have friends from my primary and secondary schools on my FB - I couldn't tell many of them how things really are and how I really feel... Yet I've made friends online who I can tell anything to and I know that if I called them then they'd do whatever they could to be there. But I also really believe that you have to try really hard to be able to find positive things about you. If you can't find positives about you then you are always going to believe that you aren't good enough and are unlovable etc...
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  9. #149
    Got stood up again today. It's very much been a week or 2 of trying to connect with people and having nothing come back to me.

  10. #150
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Sorry about that - how are you trying to meet people?
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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