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Thread: Jokes and one liners part deux

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  1. #1
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Jokes and one liners part deux

    Right, the original thread was getting way too big, so I'm starting a new thread. Start filling it up with funnies, people
    “Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” – Arthur Ashe

  2. #2
    I used to know a boy at school called ‘Diarrhoea Dave’. He got the name because he was the only kid who could spell it.

    "Jaws was never my scene and I don't like star wars".

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    Paula (29-02-16)

  4. #3
    I like to play chess with old men in the park, although it’s hard to find 32 of them.

    "Jaws was never my scene and I don't like star wars".

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    Stella180 (29-02-16)

  6. #4
    I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.

    "Jaws was never my scene and I don't like star wars".

  7. #5
    The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper. She was wearing massive gloves.

    "Jaws was never my scene and I don't like star wars".

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    Paula (29-02-16)

  9. #6
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Those are brilliant!
    There's only us, There's only this, Forget regret, Or life is your to miss,
    No other road, No other way, No day but today. (Rent. Jonathan Larson)

  10. #7
    SuperWoman Stella180's Avatar
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    I won $3 million on the lottery this weekend so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity. Now I have $2,999,999.75.
    When someone told me I lived in a fantasy land I nearly fell off my unicorn

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    Paula (29-02-16)

  12. #8
    SuperWoman Stella180's Avatar
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    Current relationship status: Made dinner for two. Ate both.
    When someone told me I lived in a fantasy land I nearly fell off my unicorn

  13. #9
    SuperWoman Stella180's Avatar
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    Rick Astley will let you borrow all of his Disney movies except one. He's never gonna give you Up.
    When someone told me I lived in a fantasy land I nearly fell off my unicorn

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    Paula (29-02-16),purplefan (29-02-16)

  15. #10
    why are 2 times 10 and 2 times 11 the same thing

    because 2 times 10 is 20, and 2 times 11 is 20, too

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