Diarys are great.
Due to say I've barely left my house this summer.
By autumn, I'll get better. I don't know what to say, the things improved but my expectations had been higher, I've hoped for full recovery.
Trying to read something new about people, most young and teens, who had been struck hard by a serious illness just like me or worse.
My life is not the same as it was supposed to be.
I don't feel like I'm able to do office work now, just freelance and I want to change my place, maybe for a period.
Nothing wrong with freelance. Always needed somewhere. Do you think you are able for work?
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
selena (15-08-15)
Thank you all.
I'm just on the point of getting into hysterics, i've heard my mum saying that she's afraid I could have cancer or another kind of tumour. I have PCOS for many years and last year there was some progress, but recently I've coped with some bad health moments. I'm aware she's afraid because she's my mother and I'm her only child, but that's insupportable, especially when she starts in a way blaming herself, although she knows it has nothing to do with her.
I'm afraid, on this point I googled " euthanasia" issue, because I'm already fed up with an illness and I don't want any additional physical sufferings.
I wish to move in another country, because other causes and even this panic affect my mental health a lot.
On other side, I want to move on and before getting to sleep I have only positive images of my future, or is it also a bad sign?
I'm really confused.
Try writing everything down. You could put pros on one side and cons on the other. It would take all the words out of your head, and leave them aside until morning.
selena (15-08-15)
Mother's blame themselves for everything. It doesn't matter if it could be down to them or not. Trust me. Mother's guilt is horrific!
Have you spoken to her about all this?
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
It's the end of summer and I am confused. I know I should push myself to a change, find a job and move on. But my anxiety continues to getting me down, just like " What's the point of it, if nothing radically changes?"