(this post is pretty big so this top bit is a synopsis. basically me and my girlfriend were in love a great couple and we made each other the happiest we could be, then she went on sertraline for depression and in about week six she 'fell out of love with me almost'. some days she doesnt like me then others she'd be in love me again. now more weeks into it most days its like she cant even tolerate me she always snaps at me even when im being super nice, she doesnt even like me touching her and then one day in a week she'll be in love with me again. has anyone else experienced something like this with sertraline and if so any advice? the full story below is quite interesting to read i think so please give it a chance i need some help or even someone to relate to. thank you for reading this far).


this is the first time ive ever done something like this but im really struggling now so any help or advice would be great. i met my now girlfriend in october at uni, now i knew she had depression from the start she told me straight off but in the first term i didnt see much of it, except for when she got drunk she'd have panic attacks and end up self harming because she said it helped her. right up until christmas we were happy, i made her as happy as the depression would allow and she made me so happy aswell. we spent all our time together and loved every minute like people in love do.

christmas came so everyone let uni at went home. the depression really hit her hard when she was at home, she'd stay in bed all day, staring at the wall not wanting to see or talk to anyone, she said she started feeling like she wasnt interested in me anymore but when she came to mine and stayed over for a few days it was much better and back to 'normal'.

the depression was starting to worsen now though and when we returned to uni it caused one of the worst nights of my life, she came home drunk and happy i took her to bed and then she had a big panic attack she started hitting me, i really did take a beating, she wanted to kill herself she was begging me to let her do it but i obviously couldnt. she managed to lock herself in the bathroom where her razors were hidden and she started cutting her arms and legs, which calmed her for about 10 minutes then she started crying her eyes out again, begging me to let her end her life, she went into the kitchen and tried to slash her wrists with knives this time but i hid them all and just followed her everywhere, she tried everything to make me leave her for 10 minutes so she could do it. her arms and legs were a mess. i believe this was a genuine suicide attempt and by the end of the night i had to pin her down. finally it all sorted tapered away and she went to sleep i stayed up and kept an eye on her. it was like a different person, i couldn't understand who that girl was. now the days after was her worst time she's had. she was completely dependent on me, i was literally her only reason to live she couldnt get out of bed without me she couldnt muster a half assed smile without me.
so i booked her an appointment at the doctors and she was given sertraline within 5 minutes. now the next 6 weeks before the drugs kicked in were perfect we were a perfect couple again and when i looked in her eyes i could see the love. she said the hope of knowing it might get better helped with the depression.

a few weeks after that things are worse than ever regarding our relationship. she says she feels empty, has no motivation and doesnt not care about anything at all but she still gets out of bed everyday and does uni work and chills with her friends. but when it comes to me she has no patience for me at all most days and doesnt want to see me at all, then one day she'll literally be back in love with me again and we'll have an amazing day together. but recently everytime i see her now she ends up snapping at me for no reason and we end up arguing, on these days we also share no intimacy despite me wanting to touch her she just doesnt want too. i can always tell withing the first few seconds of meeting her if we're gonna have a good day or a bad one, i can see it by the way she looks at me. she doesnt enjoy going out to clubs with our friendship group anymore which she did before.

she said to me yesterday that shed rather feel sad than feeling this emptiness that she does now. if we broke up which im pretty terrified of i'd be crestfallen but she would get on with her life without hardly a second thought. she knows this isnt right, we were that couple which everyone envied before the pills, we truly loved each other and made each other happy everytime we saw each other. we've decided to lower the dosage of sertraline to see if it changes anything. ive posted this really because i just needed to get it out there and see if anyone has experienced anything similar and has any advice for me?