Golf? Pit and put is more my style.
Mitz thanks for the suggestions, i will lookinto them but i have to admit i am a bit wary of internet meet up. I like to meet people through social events arranged by people i know, but that sounds quite fun. I hate going to a restaurant to eat on my own. Your at the table all alone and everybody else is with someone. Even Chinese buffets. I feel as if everyone is staring at me. "look at Billy nio mates over there".
They look at me and think I'm cool, I'm purplefan at night I rule.
oh yes I know, I can't go out to eat on my own either - I don't mind going out for coffee/sandwich on my own during the day with a book or something though, but not for a proper dinner, I would find it really lonely! it is a bit scarey going on a meet up on your own - but I've done it a few times now with different groups....and really it is fine, as everyone else is in the same boat. When you join the website, you create a 'profile' (you don't have to put much on it) but everyone else has got one, and when you join a group and accept an invite to something it shows everyone else who has RSVP'd for that event' so you know who is going (although some people cancel or something at the last minute), and there is also conversation board so you can chat before you go or ask the events organiser something; or message people privately. Actually a few times I made arrangements with a couple of ladies to meet outside the venue , so I didn't have to go in alone. But it really is fine, nothing to be wary of - its really popular and lots of people do it, so I'd definitely recommend it if you are looking for social activities to do with others - you might find a new hobby!
Defenitly going to look into it mitz sounds like you had a really good experience. I do enjoy eating out and it is nice to share the experience.
I get fed up taking the lead and phoning up. it would be nice if it was the other way round. In my church for example, I got invite round for coffee and a meal and there is no problem there but having a night out
no one seems to do it. its worse during the summer holidays.
They look at me and think I'm cool, I'm purplefan at night I rule.
i hope you find a good group or two! yes it was a good experience. Having said all that I haven't got involved for ages, well not till before the last time I was unwell, but I'm feeling a bit better, so I will look at what is going on again. I find loneliness horrible, I get very lonely too, but |I seem to have felt lonely forever! Funnily enough more so in the summer months, I think its because the days are longer, so it feels like more time to fill, and everyone is out 'looking' like they are enjoying themselves out and about with family etc enjoying the weather and longer days and nights.
Mitz if there is one thing in this world i could cure it would be loneliness.
You could be in a crowded room and still feel the loneliest person in the world. I have a lovely family and since i moved in with them, i have lost touch with the people i knew in London.
At my age it is so hard to start again.
I dont want to use my church as a social club at the moment it is the only social outlet i have. I even stopped going to the football and that hurt me as i loved it and i pondered about going to a new club but i just cant, and most of the social activities involve having someone with you.
They look at me and think I'm cool, I'm purplefan at night I rule.
Pf you're not that old, you're around the same age as my dad and they've moved 100s of miles and have had to start again making a social life. He suffers from depression, anxiety, OCD, and social phobia so it wasn't easy, especially as he moved a few months before my mum, who he'd always relied on to be the social one. I don't want to be harsh, but I think you're lonely because you're scared of making the effort, not because you can't have a social life out of London.gif "(bear)")
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
purplefan (20-05-15)
I don't know if that is true (about making the effort) The friends i did have were connected to Either my work or football, And it is hard starting new friendships. I do enjoy my art class but i have bonded well with the people in it. I di make friends when i was in the sanctuary and I have not seen them since. Remember when i was in there, i was really excited about paul and how we were going to keep in touch? I phoned two or three times and arranged to meet but he canceled.
Perhaps it is my depression that puts me off? If you dont like yourself, then how are other people going to like you? (just a thought)
They look at me and think I'm cool, I'm purplefan at night I rule.
I've been there - and I firmly believe it's that most people really don't want any reminders of that horrible time
I've had depression all my life and have good friends. Your friends were from work and football, I think (please correct me if I'm wrong) because you spent all your time at work or football. That's now not the case, but doesn't mean you can't make friends elsewhere. You just have to get out there and try, hard, I know, that it is x
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
Having travelled the country with my hobbies I've met a lot of people over the years but I do struggle making and maintaining close friendships and relationships. I understand how difficult I can be with my mood swings. Of course with depression the strong pull to withdraw from society and protect yourself from further hurt doesn't help.
I don't think that's only a sign of depression, I think that we all meet people and then move away and so friendships/support all changes...
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
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