New, down and hopeless!

Hi, I'm an old woman. I am currently finding it very hard to look to the future, given that it can't more than 15 or so years at most. I have been married for 41 yrs, 30 of them happily - and then my husband became an alcoholic for eight years. Never physicially abusive but a ghastly time of worrying incessantly that if he was ten mins. late he was drinking and he was. Lying,going missing, getting phone calls saying he was sitting in his car out for the count. Falling over in the street, etc etc. He is much younger than I so I had to cope with this starting when I was over sixty! I planned to work until 75 but at 70 I couldn't go on. I had been in touch with the love of my life from half a century before but only in a sporadic, pretty distant way. In the last six months emails changed. At his request, I went to live with him in the tropics, he was a widower. Three years of happiness and he said he didn't want me any more. I came back, I own half the house, my husband doesn't drink and he wants to start again. Of course everything has changed. I am trying so hard to see a future but as a chronic depressive I find it often impossible. I have been rejected. There it is. I think of helping those worse off than myself but I fear I'd scarcely cheer them up. I am without any funds but state pension. I sound as though I am a real wet weak but I do keep it mostly to myself. Most people would think of me as jolly, outgoing, amusing. I'm not, I'm crying incessantly and the doctor refused to up my dose of antidepressant and recommended talking therapy. All v well but the waiting list is six months. By then, I'll be even more of a mess! So, so sorry this has been such a long winded, dreary message.

Hi and welcome (hi). What an awful time you’ve had! I’m so sorry you’ve been treated so badly. And I’m glad you’ve found us, having the kind, supportive community like this can make a huge difference. I just want to say - yes one man rejected you but another wants you. I know it’s a lot more complicated than that, but I hope it’s a thought that could be a start to your new life - whatever that may be

Hi and welcome to DWD! You've been through so much! But I promise you that you don't sound like a "wet weak" at all! I think you sound like a lovely lady who has had too much to deal with. I know the damage an alcoholic can do...
Welcome to our little community. We have people of all ages, all backgrounds and from all over the world. This is a safe place to talk...

You're certainly not a "wet week" you've had things really rough.

I'm forgetting myself hi (hi) as Suzi said we're a community of all ages I myself am past 70 and retired, I go to a luncheon club every week and there's a guy there who is 96 so in that respect I'm still a youngster :)

Hello and welcome, I will google what a wet week is. As I am sure that what I think it is will be wrong (I am from the Netherlands).

That is a great deal that has happened to you. Your story reminds me a bit about my aunt. She had a lot happen and found it hard to cope. But she did manage to make the best of it and enjoy herself.

Here we are from all walks of life. All ages and even countries. But all are friendly and wish each other well.

I am rambling a bit. But (hi)

Thank you all for your support. I often really do feel that there is no point in going on. I do realise that so many other suffer depression in the same way (ridiculous, we all suffer depression in a slightly different way I think) but as I get old I am finding it more difficult. My dear husband is trying so hard but he isn't the love of my life and it was his drinking that made me leave. He doesn't seem quite to realise the damage he caused. Ah well, dear friends, I'm sure I'll survive.

There is always a point in going on and there is always a way through. I hope we can help you see that (bear)

I completely agree with Paula.
My father in law is an alcoholic and I've seen the damage caused to his partner, my husband and his sister and our children. I sympathise..

Though things may look dark you've got to look for that spot of light and hang on to it, as others say alcohol addiction is a terribly destructive thing, just chat on here as we're a very understanding group.