Introducing myself *AB TRIGGERS*
Hello everyone! I’m new here in the DWP just to introduce myself. I’m 46 and I’ve been diagnosed with depression illness in 2014 by my GP. Since then I started with medicine Venlafaxine started from 75mg to a 150 daily which I’m sticking on at the moment. I found out that the Venlafaxine works ina differently ways depending on which Brand I use and I’m still on my searching to find out why but I’ll have to open a second thread to discuss it and see everybody’s opinion.
Well I can say that after 3 years on Venlafaxine treatment and constantly visits to the GP I think I can feel a coordinated mental condition that I didn’t experiment before. I realised that I suffered for more long than my doctor and I thought. I had an abusive childhood, physical and emotional abuse as as little as I can remember to be, for example had have a boiling fudge poured on my body at the age of 9 months. I’m still with my childhood memories alive on my mind but with the medicine treatment in this days sometimes I don’t allow it to bother me too much but sometimes still in there in the dark side of my mind scaring me, trying to stop me to live, it’s difficult but I’m a fighter.
I don’t work since 2013, I’m not on benefits either as to helping with the depression I started make crafts and bits at home and sell it online and actually I do still selling, I make art dolls and I absolutely love it. I can’t find myself working with something else now.
I don’t like to socialise too much and sometimes besides the daily walks with my dogs I can stay 1 or 2 weeks at home making my dolls. I’m happy in that way and it’s ruins my day when my husband book some dinner or drink with friends that I feel I don’t have much in common to talk. I just enjoy my days on my own company, my dogs and my husband’s company at night, also my Mondays at my Pottery course, I love to be in there with people that also like to sculp, paint and draw so we have lots to talk.
The only thing I’ve lost is myself care. I don’t bother with things that were actually a physical pressure I think. I’ve gained weight with the use of Venlafaxine so the self esteem decreased and it’s something that my husband complains sometimes. He is a gym addicted and I don’t really like to go but I remember in the past was a good feeling after workout perhaps I’m thinking soon get back to the gym slowly, I don’t like pressure and I want to do it on my time when I’m ready. In the mean time during the treatment I’ve managed to stop smoking, 3 years smoking free and not alcohol too. So I’m ok, despite the side effects but are not too bad. I realised that if i started it sooner perhaps in my teen time perhaps my life shouldn’t have been so complicated as it was.
So my advice is if you feel you’re not yourself go for help, don’t let it to later and stop suffering.
Love to all
Xx
