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If he didn't value your relationship then you wouldn't have been introduced to his best friend. It's going to hurt with things like that right in your face, but he and Paula are right. It's not "your problem" to deal with. If you are both serious about each other then you have to talk about these things and deal with them head on together. If you hide this away, he'll feel he has to hide other things away and you'll end up in a mess. Seriously, you love him so talk to him!
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I know! I know you're all right.
One thing I noticed last night... last year when we saw The Bluetones, I struggled to walk any great distance without a lot of pain in my lower back and I struggled to stand up all night as it hurt so much. This year, I only had some pain in my hip, my back was pretty much ok, I sat down for 1 song and the rest of the time I was stood up, and even bopping away! I'm even walking further with very little pain in my back when I'm out with J. He's been very good for my physical health too :)
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That's such good news. I'm not sure of the statics on back pain, but for every pound weight you lose, it's four pounds of pressure off your knees.
From what you've said the weight loss has helped your back too.
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Wow!! I never knew that! I've lost just short of 42lbs so far.
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And you should be so proud of yourself!
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I am a little, but as usual for me, I think I can do better
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Wow Jaq 42lbs is some going!! Fantastic. I know I go on a bit sometimes but I have probs with my knees if I gain too much weight and it flipping hurts! Even a few pounds helps...so you've lost 21 bags of sugar!!! Look at it like that and it's amazing! I've been a bit anti-social lately and not been on here as much as I should. Do I take it that J has his own place now? (save me going through pages of posts) That's great! Oh, and while I'm here. Think of this: If J hadn't had a family and a history then you wouldn't be with him. It's all of the events in both your lives that have led up to what you have today. I found it very difficult when Ian and I were first together. I've realised I'm a jealous bitch! He has a few lady 'friends' and they'd call occasionally on the phone. Photos too of him and them. It took ages for me to get used to and it dragged me down a lot. But one day he said after an argument. "I'm with YOU not them!! Doesn't that tell you something?" They're my friends too now. But I know where you're coming from. Instinct tells you to rip photos off fridges and tear them up and stamp on them. But remember, pieces of paper with faces on are absolutely NO threat to you. It's the pictures of you and him that matter and I bet there's more of those than there is under fridge magnets!
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The mortgage offer has been confirmed so it will just be his soon. I think a lot of my problem is we're not public yet, he wants everything sorted legally first so she can't use me as an excuse to be awkward, that and I don't think very much of myself so I'm scared he'll find someone better. Him having female friends doesn't bother me, it's her.
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Soooo at what point will you be confident enough to not get upset about the ‘family’ photos? ......