Not so much his children as children in general
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Not so much his children as children in general
Oh, lovely (panda)
Eleanor Grace arrived at half 2 this morning. 6lb 4.5oz. She's gorgeous. And I do feel excited to meet her but there's also a hell of a lot of pain knowing that will never be me...
Hunni that's a pain I wish I could take away for you. I'm so sorry (bear)(bear)(bear)
It's something I need to learn to deal with
Have you ever talked about it in counselling? I know my cousin's wife has had counselling, but she says it still feels like she is grieving for the baby she's never had each time someone close to her has a baby.... There's nothing I can say to take that pain away.... But know you are loved and I'm giving you massive hugs right now.
That's exactly how it feels. I'm happy for her but it feels like someone has my heart in a vice at the same time and there's a massive lump in my throat. It sucks. It's probably not helped that I've had so many tips on how to be around the children. Don't force it, let them come to you, don't kiss and cuddle in front of them as T struggles to deal with it, keep a lid on the affection in front of them for now... I may not have children but I'm not an idiot.
From what I have learned about you I think you have a natural ability to be great around kids. They always seem to find you when you are around. That is something that is hard to teach or learn. I am so sorry you have to learn and deal with it. When I see people that are able too and choose not to it seems so cruel when I hear this.
(panda)(panda)
One thing that does give me a smile is seeing how you still can be such a positive, warm and caring woman to others. When reading that you brushed her hair with your fingers while she normaly does not allow people to touch her hair. These are small things but ow so important. And will shape a long lasting loving bond.
That's a lovely thing to say
For the record, I'd be bloody honoured to have you in my kids life and you know how protective of them I am! I know it's not the same, but I promise you that you are amazing and they are lucky to have you.
Mira is right. It's not about the big things, the big spends... it's about being there and doing things like combing her hair, talking to them, spending time with them, being interested in what they are doing - that's what makes memories, self confidence in them and the best Mum figure they could have in their lives. It's not about giving birth, it's about the rest of their lives....