Selena, it’s your decision. It’s your life and your career
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Selena, it’s your decision. It’s your life and your career
Can I be rude? I don't mean to be, but I think blunt is probably better...
Our eldest is almost 18. He's been looking at universities and courses. He has chosen that after his A Levels this summer he is wanting to go to a uni on the other side of the country to do an amazing sounding law course. Both of these are HIS choices as it's his life.
My daughter is almost 15. Last term at school she had to pick what options she wanted to take for her GCSE exams in 2 years time. Marc and I guided her, but it's her life and her decision. We chose to let her do the things she loves to do....
Our youngest isn't sure what languages or sciences she wants to do. She's heavily dyslexic and her spelling in English is appalling, however she is excelling in French and Spanish and all 3 sciences and art. What options she picks are HER choice. It's HER life.
Do you see where I'm getting at? My Mum insisted I took Business Studies A Level. I hated it. Every second of it. I did brilliantly in it, but hated it. I would have rathered done something different... I will never make my children take something if they don't want to (unless it's compulsory lol)
It's a sad fact, but your Mum isn't always going to be here and do you really want to be tied to a job you hate and is making you ill when you have so many hopes and dreams of travel and freelance and being your own boss? You will never be as young as you are right here, right now. Do whatever YOU want. Do NOT live your life for her.
One word to what Suzi posted - AMEN
I couldn't have put it better, you can guide your children but NEVER push them in a direction they don't want to go.
You can't live someone else's life they're taken so just live your own.
Either work for a different company or set out on your own either way don't stay in a job where you're so badly treated.
Life ain't easy for any of us, you're a talented translator Selena so go for it. (panda)
Thank you everybody.
I should definitely go.
She has become dangerous. Especially two last incidents proved it.
Yesterday a man came to her office for translation services, he was from Israel.He shouted at her that she hadn't done her services properly. A translator from my company did it.
Generally, she is good at her job.
But this man came and asked for stamp of sworn translator, because the girl is not sworn.
This man was very nervous and he seemed crazy too.
She asked me to put my stamp and sign like I had done it. I replied instead that I should check it carefully first and refused-NO. He didn't want to wait for proper check
and I refused. She shouted, called me all names, jumped.
A colleague of mine, also sworn translator of English and Romanian, just like me, a good translator who worked nights too. She became sworn this spring, also pair English-Romanian.
We had been recognized as specialists able to translate into English and to present a clear message of Romanian text.
Well, she decided to leave after New Year, because she cannot tolerate it anymore.
She has told me today she cannot imagine how I still survive in this chaos.
She came to my boss yesterday with a statement that she wants to leave.
My boss threatened her and said she would not let anyone sworn go in that simple way, because we will regret.
But she can let her go if she resigns forever and never works as a translator in Moldova.
She has no right because she didn't give us this right, but the Ministry of Justice.
Now the girl has told me she wants to leave in 2 weeks.
She told me other translator who left the company, had also been threatened
I asked how she thinks to sort it out.
The girl said she would go to Labor Inspection and to Police and will record everything if necessary.
My boss has become crazy and dangerous.
Now I think what to do next.
Also: one of managers treated badly my customer (this lady has mental problems due to her). They shouted at her and she was mocked. My boss has began to call people "idiots, carrots, Aspergers".
If I have mental problems, this has nothing to do with her, and that does not make a nothing.
Sorry for any mistakes.
(panda) so, does that mean you’ve resigned? How much longer can you last in that toxic environment, lovely?
You really need to to resign Selena you can't possibly work under such conditions (bear) (panda)
I would have gone yesterday, if not my mother.
I don't know how to escape from this witch.
I have suicidal thoughts.
Selena, I don't know how we can make you see that you have to leave. If you are having suicidal thoughts then you have to do something about it. You HAVE to get help from the psch/mental health team and you have to leave....
Thank you for your support.
It will be hard to find an official new job before New Year, but I can definitely look up (although have a little time).
Just might God give me strength because it has become impossible.
I would also like to share some of my feelings, inner battle.
I'm feeling sometimes lower in comparison with others because of my mental problems, of this strugle (not related to my work problems). Like I'm feeling guily because I'm unable to be like average persons and to overcome these horrible thoughts.
1 in every 4 people suffer with mental health issues in their lifetime. That sounds pretty average to me ...
I've mostly meant bipolar disorder, suicidal thoughts etc.
That is true, but in my country unfortunately there is still a stigma related to mental health disorders. Although there have been some good changes in this aspect too.
But Selena, you can get help with your health issues and if you stick to the medication and eating properly and getting some exercise you can have a perfectly "normal" life. You seem to allow your diagnoses to weigh you down and become who you are. They aren't. You are so lovely and such an awesome person. Just be kind to you..
Have you actually been diagnosed as having bipolar?
It was one of the doctors' I've seen theory.
He suspected it, but I needed more exams.
I want to sort out anything, just don't know how. Mental health assistance here is rather expensive or I need to wait longer.
Now I'm trying to find a new job with more or less normal salary.
On the good side, I've bought today two nice bra sets.
Then don't assume you have it until you have it officially diagnosed by a specialist. You've had a really tough year, it's perfectly normal to be up and down with everything you've gone through.
I think mental health assistance across the world takes forever unless you can pay - where I live even the self referral IAPT waiting list for treatment is months. Selena, you have to see your doctor.
Ftr, my official diagnosis is bipolar disorder with anxiety. I don’t think I’m bipolar but ultimately the diagnosis is irrelevant to me, it’s the treatment that matters
I completely agree with the others.. Don't self diagnose!
Hey sweetheart, how are you doing? How’s your mum?
I've been wondering the same thing
Thank you for caring.
Pretty the same, I didn't find another well-paid job yet. The only good thing is that my boss slowed down her pressure. I just told her directly I am ready to resign.
My mum is still weak, but is feeling better.
I'm eager to restart my CBT sessions, as I'm very depressed and anxious, although I've been trying to hide this before other people.
Why are you trying to hide how you are feeling?
Does your Mum have a diagnoses? Is she still being seen by the drs?
She has not undergone any new tests so far, cancer tumor was removed, but she still faces some problems even with walking. Yes, she can apply any time to doctors.
She is monitored.
I think too many bad things occurred too quickly, for example I didn't even have time to grieve my grandma's death.
You’ve absolutely had far too many horrible things happen in a very short space of time. How are you coping with work, looking after mum and having responsibility for keeping your home going?
I completely agree. You haven't had time to deal with anything before you've been hit with something else horrible..
Yes, this definitely had an impact, I think I haven't regained yet all my inner forces back.
It is hard, and I've been struggling these days with bad headaches. Sometimes I'm just willing to fade away, althout it's irresponsible of me, I'm simply feeling very down now and worn out.
Are you eating and drinking properly? Taking your meds properly?
Sincerely not enough, now trying to do my best.
You need fuel to keep you going, love. But I know you know that
Sweetheart you've been saying that for ages, you HAVE to look after you. You can't look after anyone else if you aren't fit and well - or as well as you can be. Trust me, I know....
Going to a work party again and again that unpleasant feeling to join this event.
I hope you’re able to enjoy it
I hope you have a lovely time...
I've had some good moments with my colleagues, although my boss was as usually pretty fake, but I appreciate those moments.
Glad you had some good times lovely!
Not a day goes by without thinking about your support, otherwise it would have been much harder for me to survive.
Because of many circumstances, and I should pretend to be in good mood at home.
We've had some photos from the party. No, my mom didn't mentin anything about "deformed", but still that I'm not looking exactly healthy, being anyway over weight. But, as for me, I think I should be proud of what I'm.
Yes, I'm not ideal, but even perfect women without consequences of illness have failed in love. So, the most important is to care about myself, my health, the things not always easy.
As for my failures, especially recent ones on dating sites, I've just decided to take a break from dating for a while.
I knew a couple a while back. He was skinny while she was seriously overweight. She talked about losing weight but he discouraged her - saying he loved her just the way she was. While maybe not a healthy approach, it showed me that loving someone has absolutely nothing to do with weight, the size of your nose, the length of your hair (Si has always preferred mine short despite every other partner he had having long hair) or any other aspect of your appearance.
That is true too, like my mom now thinks that too skinny is a nightmare too.
Well, I've tried to focus on positive features beyond physical ones, and in this way I managed to switch on from other topics.
Marc has known me at my smallest and my largest. He's known me in better health and in rubbish health. Sweetheart you have to find a way to get through this. You aren't built like a size zero supermodel and that's good! Be you!
Selena, we have a cosmetics company here called the Body shop, and one year their Christmas posters bore the slogan - there is only 4% of the population built like supermodels, be yourself! It has always stayed with me. Be yourself, you are the only one of you in the whole world.