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1) trauma work was going well and we were working thru things but with meeting Him at Christmas and all he said it really knocked things back. At the moment we can't get moving on anything because I am so unstable, because I'm off my meds, because of the trauma. Yup vicious circle and I can't break it on my own.
2) I know I need to get back on them and I want to but the fear of the nightmares when I sleep at the moment is clouding everything. Also because I am now chronically sleep deprived I'm having hallucinations which He is haunting which makes the fear worse.
3) I know. I need to sort it.
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Would you take a sleeping tablet?
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Yeah I have before short term. They are not keen to prescribe for more than 2 weeks.
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I understand that, but lovely, you need some sleep....
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Hey hun. How’s things today?
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I'm ok. Bit flat but I'm still going. A just asked me if I'd taken my meds today. I said no. He asked why? I just said i forgot. I know perfect chance to talk butbi just cant be bothered getting into it with him.
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What are you afraid of? A will only want to help. Can you not take a deep breath and go and speak to him? You know theres also a chance he knows you’re not taking them? You have fought through so much to get where you are now, why not take the next step?
You have helped to get me to where I am. I would not have taken the step I did a few weeks ago without a nudge from you. Give yourself that same nudge or take one from me now.
Love you.xx
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Sweetheart can you get 10 mins on your own with him? Then take a deep breath and start with
"A I love you, I need to talk to you and I need you to listen, accept what I'm saying and not judge me. I love you and right now I really need your love and support. You know that I've had issues around christmas and this year it completely derailed me. I'll explain more when I can, but I need you to know that I haven't taken my meds since then. I can't explain it all right now, but I'm poorly and hurting and need your help to get better"
Or something...