Hope you're still resting!
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Hope you're still resting!
What’s this week looking like?
Busy. Yesterday finished off my workbench, cleaned the mastic off the windows, constructed 5 sets of shelves, loaded the kiln, made 3 cows, invoiced several customers. Today packed and posted 15 cows, 5 owls and 5 trinket bowls, ran two classes, sorted out 4 boxes of recycling, 2 wheely bins and a green wheely, unloaded a kiln, loaded a kiln, put up a shelf, done a load of washing, made a cow.
Now so tired I can hardly stand
So. Does that mean you’re going to take it a little easier tomorrow??
I might spend more time sitting down... taking Dad out, unloading and loading the kiln, clear glazing a mountain of kids work, meeting at friend for coffee, sorting out what I need to buy from my supplier, making cows, doing my washing and running a class.
Are you getting any help with any of that?
Then does it all really need to be done now? Can some of it not wait a bit?
No. Not really
Really? Cos looking at it from the outside, things like cleaning mastic off Windows, constructing shelves etc are exactly the sort of things you didn’t need to be adding to your todo list on a week when you’ve no help......
Lol. Yes put like that.
Anyway that's all done now. I was desperate to get into the new workshop as soon as possible and yesterday I was able to start making cows in there. It was lovely to be working in a space that was all mI need.
I'm glad, but honestly love you have to learn to pace and to be kind to yourself.
I do pace it's just my pace is a run. When there is so much that needs to be done I can't just sit around.
I just worry that whilst you are running at full steam you aren't taking much care of you....
I think i do. I shower, I have a walk every day, I wash my clothes, I take my meds I try to eat properly (most of the time).
When I was getting benefits it was easier to be able to stop and rest, now I don't get anything (and actually had to pay back 2k) I have to work harder to pay the bills.
Keeping clean, fed and medicated is only the very basics of taking care of you. You should be giving yourself time to relax, to rest, to be with loved ones, to socialise, even, maybe, to treat yourself. Self care is not just about doing what you need to keep your body going, it’s also about what you need to keep your mind and soul alive itms
No one can work 24 hours a day for 7 days a week. We aren't built that way...
I looked at my bank balance last night. Not conducive to taking it easy!
But maybe pacing better would mean you could work more evenly, rather than a boom and bust/manic and crash way you've been recently?
But I don't know how to pace. I really don't know what that means.
To me pacing is writing a list of what has to be done and working through it and when it's finished in can sit down for a bit.
When I was a kid we were never allowed to just sit around. We were expected to have something to do all the time. My mother never never stopped doing things. Even in the evening she would spin, weave, knit, make jewellery.
She had a saying that she drummed into me. "Don't kill time, work it to death "
I always feel guilty if I can see that there are jobs to be done but I have my feet up. As a child if I was sick my mother would make me feel guilty for being in bed by tidying up my bedroom around me whilst making grumbling noises about the mess.
Stopping and resting is something I can only do when exhaustion takes over.
Even now I am thinking I could do with running the vacuum cleaner over the floor before I go to bed.
Pacing is about spacing out things during the day and adding in low energy tasks/spaces too...
This might give you a better idea... http://stickmancommunications.co.uk/...oducts/PKPAC01
Thank you. I like that it makes more sense to me. I may even be tempted to buy a set of the magnets and poster!
Glad it helps!
The creator of Stickman - Hannah is someone who lives with chronic illness, so she gets it. She sells some brilliant items
I have bought the set and a number of her cards. They may be useful to give H and A the heads up that I need help.
I am wiped out today. Walked the dodgy and done some shopping but exhausted now.
Then I hope you’ve decided to rest....
I don't have any choice. My body has shut down. I can't get warm or stand for more than 5 minutes
The idea with pacing is that you don’t get to the point you are at today when your body shuts down. So, in the spirit of it, would it help if you told us here what you have to do tomorrow and we could help you with a pacing timetable?
Jobs I need to do this week
must do Monday. Load glaze kiln and fire
Prepare studio for Tuesday's classes
before H and A come back Tuesday lunchtime
Clean the bathroom
Clean the kitchen
Vacuum the landing
Other jobs that have to be done this week
Clear glaze the small mountain of stuff from kids classes and parties
Load and fire the biscuit kiln
Glaze owls (6 of them)
Make more owls
Make sheep
Glaze chickens (7 of them)
Make 10 cows
Glaze 30 cows
Create and send newsletter
Update website
Respond to customers emails
Run 7 classes
Sort out accounts and payroll
Take Dad out Wednesday morning
I think that's all.
Monday is the only day i don't have classes so I try and squeeze as much into it as I can.
Oh I should add it takes about 15 minutes per cow, owl or chicken to glaze them
If you can help with pacing I would appreciate it
What classes have you got and when?
Tuesday 1till 3 7 till 9
Wednesday 7 till 9
Thursday 7 till 9
Friday 4.15 to 5.15
Saturday 11 till 1 and 3 till 5
To start with, you’ve not put anything on that list that’s gentler on you, or gives you some space to think. Then you separate the list into, things you must do, things which shouldn’t be put off and things you can leave for a few days. So can you do that first?
What about adding in what things others are doing to help too...
That list is the things I must do that should not be put off this week. With possible exception of the newsletter.
There is a second list of things that can be out off that include
Change my bed
Vacuum my floor
Sort out the stuff at the back of the studio
Clean my bedroom.
Etc.
H can help with the clear glazing and the biscuit firing. But the rest is down to me.
In the time for me section is the daily walk with Ember.
There are not enough hours in the day till Friday night to do anything else.
Oh I forgot the kids session on Thursday 2 till 4
Although I feel guilty for spending the money I am looking forward to getting that fridge magnet set so I can try out building a routine that may work.
I think you need to find a way to cut back on at least some of the things you do....
Ok, so that list is the ‘should do’ list. Perhaps you need to cut that back to the ‘absolutely have to do’ list. Eg, as well as the newsletter, do you have to update the website? If it needs doing, can you not delegate?
I have no one I can delegate that kind of stuff to. Everything on that list has to be done.
Today I did get a load of cows glazed, a couple more made, loaded and fired the kiln and cleaned the bathroom, landing and my bedroom floor. I did find a bit of time to sit and see as well.
Got myself in the doldrums a bit tonight when I started to consider what a terrible mother I have been.
Why can you not delegate to H and A? How much do they do to help?
Why do you think you’re a terrible mother? Tbh everything you’re doing for H now is above and beyond what I’d be willing to do for my kids at that stage in their lives .....
What made you start thinking about whether you've been a terrible mother or not?
I agree with Paula - why can't you delegate some of the stuff? TBH you're paying her and A and what are they doing to earn that money?