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suzi
05-11-2007, 08:50 AM
Costume Party

A couple was invited to a swanky costume Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going.
So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain and, as it was still early, decided to go the party.

Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.

She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new babe that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished , naturally, since he was her husband.

Finally, he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little bang. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.
She was sitting up reading when he came in, and she asked what kind of a time he had.

He said: "- Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."

- "Did you dance much?"

- "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to.. ....."

suzi
05-11-2007, 08:52 AM
A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, 'You have been a good
cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking.'

The cat thought for a minute and then said, 'All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden
floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.'

God said, 'Say no more.' Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow.

A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to Heaven together. God met the
mice at the gates with the same offer that He made to the cat

The mice said, 'Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and even people with brooms!
If we could just have some little roller skates, we would not have to Run again.' God answered, 'It is done.' All the mice
had beautiful little roller skates.

About a week later, God decid ed to check on the cat. He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow. God
Gently awakened the cat and asked, 'Is everything okay? How have you been doing? Are you happy?'

The cat replied, 'Oh, it is WONDERFUL. I have never been so happy in my life. The pillow is so fluffy, and
Those little Meals on Wheels you have been sending over are delicious!'

seaspirit
05-11-2007, 08:55 AM
:hysterical3::hysterical3:brilliant :clapping::clapping: