Pixie85
03-12-21, 10:59 PM
My cousin passed away recently. The police went round and had to break in. Cause of death not established yet....police are investigating. She had her demons and struggled with alcohol/depression and often wrote on Facebook how she wanted to harm herself....just never thought she'd do it. She just turned 46. We never saw each other as often as we should have really but we did talk alot via Facebook messenger....it's just so sad.
I went to see my mum and she told me more about it all. Things I didn't even know. I feel like I should of known because even though we didn't actually see each other much, we regularly spoke over Facebook. It's hit me harder because now I know more, I see similarities between us....depression, she stopped looking after herself, stopped seeing friends/family, wouldn't leave the house, had an awful ex that was using her for sex, she drank too much, had an eating disorder and was apparently only around 5/6 stone when she died and was using a frame to help her walk....she was supposed to have people come to check on her daily but the last time she was seen alive was Fri, when her friend dropped off more alcohol and left her to it.
In some weird and morbid kinda way, it's making me have these horrible thoughts of it being me in another 10 years when I'm 46....the similarity is actually scary....and I still haven't even been able to bring myself to call that number for an appt. It's ridiculous, isn't it....how I'm struggling as much as I am and I know there is help there but I can't seem to accept it....just like her
I went to see my mum and she told me more about it all. Things I didn't even know. I feel like I should of known because even though we didn't actually see each other much, we regularly spoke over Facebook. It's hit me harder because now I know more, I see similarities between us....depression, she stopped looking after herself, stopped seeing friends/family, wouldn't leave the house, had an awful ex that was using her for sex, she drank too much, had an eating disorder and was apparently only around 5/6 stone when she died and was using a frame to help her walk....she was supposed to have people come to check on her daily but the last time she was seen alive was Fri, when her friend dropped off more alcohol and left her to it.
In some weird and morbid kinda way, it's making me have these horrible thoughts of it being me in another 10 years when I'm 46....the similarity is actually scary....and I still haven't even been able to bring myself to call that number for an appt. It's ridiculous, isn't it....how I'm struggling as much as I am and I know there is help there but I can't seem to accept it....just like her