Having a difficult couple of days *AB Triggers*

[Pixie85]

I emailed my GP surgery last night to arrange a telephone consultation. The last few days have been hard and I had a tearful night last night, which made me think I need an appointment.

[Suzi]

Sorry that you've been struggling, but it's really positive that you've contacted your GP lovely. Do you want to talk about why you have been struggling?

[Paula]

Well done for getting that appointment, Pixie. Has there been any specific that’s triggered this?

[Pixie85]

I don't know to be honest, one minute I'm watching something and the next I've literally just burst into tears from no where. I do have some unresolved issues and was advised by my dr to self refer for counselling but I haven't been able to make that step yet. Plus my partner isn't being very supportive of me on an anti depressant and wants me to come off them (but he doesn't know any of these past issues)

[Paula]

Would you be able to talk to your partner? Love, please sort out counselling - ADs can’t do everything and, if you’re struggling with unresolved issues, those need to be resolved….

[shine]

Ads can help your symptoms while you wait for therapy. Definitely self refer as soon as you can.

[Suzi]

Why doesn't he want you to be taking ADs?

[Pixie85]

I don't want to tell my other half anything....it's such a hard situation. He doesn't want me on them because he says i dont need them and the longer I'm on them, the harder it will be to stop :/

[Suzi]

How long have you been together? Can I ask why you don't want to tell him what's going on? Lovely, you deserve the support of those around you. How long have you been on the meds? What dose? When did you last speak to your Dr about how things are?

[Pixie85]

We've been together 7 years. I just don't want him to know. I don't want anyone to know. I have some support from people online in groups like this. If I tell him about my past, I think it would ruin things. I started taking them on 15th July...started on 25mg then was upped to 50mg on the 21st and the 21st is the last time I spoke to him

Have a telephone consultation booked but it's not until the 7th Oct and I might even have to rearrange that as it clashes with the school run

I feel like it's never going to be resolved. I don't want to talk to anyone about it because I don't want any finding anything out. Especially my parents....imagine how they'd feel if I told them I was abused by my 2 brothers. 2 brothers who I still see on occasion. I feel stuck

[Suzi]

You haven't spoken to your GP since 21st July? Hunni, go back and see them.
You haven't done anything wrong lovely. I was wondering if you'd ever thought about specific counselling. It's something that I know lots of us have had/are having.... It's not right for everyone, but it is definitely worth thinking about....

[Pixie85]

Sorry, didn't mean to double post....I was just writing as I was thinking. Like a specific sexual abuse counsellor? I don't know

[Paula]

Hunni, unfortunately this is never going to be resolved unless you talk about it. ADs can only do so much when there’s trauma in the past like you’ve suffered. Please talk to your doctor, and please make that referral to counselling. Love, you deserve to be at peace with yourself (panda)

As for your partner, as you’ve been together 7 years, he surely loves you and only wants the best for you…..

Hunni, I’ve added a trigger warning to your thread. It’s nothing to be concerned about, it just ensures that anyone who might struggle with what’s discussed, can be warned

[Suzi]

I totally agree with Paula. It's essential that you get some more support. Why are you so reluctant to tell him what's going on? He might be more understanding about why you're taking meds etc

[Pixie85]

I don't think it would make a difference. I remember watching something with him a few months ago when the abuser was close in age and my other half said it was "kids being kids" and he felt sorry for the abuser....my brothers are close in age...one is 1 year older and the other 6 years older. I don't want to hear him say it to me

[Paula]

But, maybe, because he loves you, that mindset will be challenged

[Suzi]

I agree. Sweetheart if your relationship isn't built on truth and trust then how can you expect him to change? I know how hard it was to tell my now husband. I did though and all he's ever done is love and support me the best he can. BUT I am not you, you are not me. We both have different paths etc... You have to do what is right for you, when it is right to do so...