Diary of a book addict

[Jaquaia]

New thread as I waffle more than I realise! (giggle)

It actually feels cool!!! I'm amazed!!!! And tired

[Angie]

Love the thread title :)

[Jaquaia]

It's so me! ;)

[OldMike]

I somehow suspected it was your thread, I wonder how ;)

[Jaquaia]

No idea Mike (angel)

[Paula]

Absolutely you :)

[Angie]

Definately you :)

[magie06]

How is the drinking going?

[Jaquaia]

Surprisingly really well!!! Almost had 2 litres and it's about 10 degrees cooler so coping much better. Still not weeing much though... I've even been downstairs all afternoon as I watched the rugby with my dad. Not the result I wanted but I did it and being around my parents for so long was tiring but it was good to get a break from my room.

[magie06]

Well done. That amazing! Not so long ago you found it difficult to get through even a glass of something. You are doing so well. Awesome!

[Paula]

That’s a huge post! Well done, lovely :)

[Jaquaia]

There is still that little voice in my head that tells me that it's pathetic that I struggle with something most people do every day, but it's getting easier to ignore.

[Suzi]

You are amazing! That post is so positive. You seem to be looking after you better too?

[Jaquaia]

The weather has made drinking a necessity over the last few days but J has also started being devious... he's started getting my mum to back him up so I'm being ganged up on at home! :(:

[Suzi]

Good! As long as it's making you drink!

[Jaquaia]

The last few days I haven't needed much reminding as I've been doing it off my own back.

[Suzi]

That's even more impressive!

How are you today?

[Paula]

Because of the weather or because you’ve got used to it?

[Jaquaia]

I would say the weather. Yesterday I was just thirsty. Today will be a test as it's 10 degrees cooler than it has been.

I'm ok but flaring a bit, mainly my wrists but my fingers are a little stiff too. I'm seeing the OT tomorrow, she's showing me hand exercises, so they may help.

[Suzi]

I'm glad you're seeing the OT. I hope they help love. Are you being kind to you whilst you are flaring?

[Jaquaia]

My plan is shower and reading. Maybe even watch something, not decided yet.

[Suzi]

Sounds lovely!

[Jaquaia]

My ribs hurt and I have a headache from laughing... J discovered my ticklish spot... He's the only person I've ever laughed like that with!

[Suzi]

I can't tell you how much I love that post!!

[Jaquaia]

He's talking about taking me away for a couple of days in the autumn (inlove)

[Suzi]

Hooray!

[Jaquaia]

Just heading to see the OT. This should be fun as my hands are stiff this morning

[Suzi]

Good, as long as see how bad it is then they can see how bad it is for you and can genuinely show them what is difficult and what would help!

[Jaquaia]

It was worse than this yesterday. I think I'm quite lucky that I've never had a major flare up as I can barely move my wrist at its worst. The fatigue is the worst part of it.

[Paula]

How did it go with the OT?

[Jaquaia]

I have a list of hand exercises to do to strengthen my hands and improve flexibility. She even gave me a tib of medical putty... must remember it's a medical aid and not a toy... She's replaced my splint too, I needed a size smaller.

[magie06]

Have you lost more weight?

[Jaquaia]

I don't know, need to get weighed. It's possible that I just have less swelling in that finger

[Angie]

Sounds positive, I would be the same with the putty have to remember its not a toy lol x

[OldMike]

Never knew there was medical putty my experience of putty is linseed oil putty, epoxy putty and silly putty, I've learned something new today :)

[Suzi]

What's the medical putty for?

[Jaquaia]

It's for hand strengthening exercises.

[Suzi]

Ahhhh, sounds fun ;)

[Jaquaia]

It is!!! It's rather satisfying to play with too (giggle)

[Suzi]

See that's what I'd do with it too!

[Jaquaia]

She gave me this one...

Rolyan Therapy Putty for Physical Therapeutic Hand Exercises, Flexible Putty for Finger and Hand Recovery and Rehabilitation, Strength Training, Occupational Therapy, 1 x 57g, Soft, Yellow https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B004ULL1VM/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_aDZpDb61ZZ77J

It's fab!!! Can see it coming in handy for stress relief too!!!

[Angie]

See that's what I'd do with it too!

This ^^^

[Suzi]

She gave me this one...

Rolyan Therapy Putty for Physical Therapeutic Hand Exercises, Flexible Putty for Finger and Hand Recovery and Rehabilitation, Strength Training, Occupational Therapy, 1 x 57g, Soft, Yellow https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B004ULL1VM/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_aDZpDb61ZZ77J

It's fab!!! Can see it coming in handy for stress relief too!!!

OMG that looks amazing!

[Jaquaia]

Another wading through treacle day, warm treacle though, it's not as bad as yesterday...I've started the washing as I needed clean clothes, and had to put all the shopping away as my dad has been called back to doctors as the lab is refusing to test the blood sample the nurse took yesterday...

[Suzi]

Why aren't they testing from yesterday?

[Jaquaia]

No idea. My dad said the nurse told him the doctor rang pathology and bollocked them about it but even the nurse wasn't sure why.

[magie06]

Do you have to get him back for more blood to be taken?

[Jaquaia]

They called him back today

[Suzi]

So he's done it?
What a palaver!

[Jaquaia]

And then started drinking as soon as he got back...

[Suzi]

Oh! :( I'm sorry love...

[Jaquaia]

I'm glad I've escaped upstairs as he's being a bit of an obnoxious dick.

[Suzi]

Oh sweetheart I'm so sorry.

[Jaquaia]

It's ok. J is popping after work if he decides he's still talking to me (giggle)

[Suzi]

(rofl)(rofl)(rofl)

[Jaquaia]

Just having a shower has exhausted me so today is going to be a good day...

[magie06]

Your body is telling you that you need to rest. Please be kind and do as your body is telling you.

[Jaquaia]

Definitely going to try though my parents need their bed making and that will probably be down to me.

[Suzi]

Then maybe their bed might have to wait for a day or so?

[Jaquaia]

It's done now. My dad stripped it first thing and my mum sorted the washer. The OT taught us an easier way to put a quilt cover on so it's not as hard as it used to be if I'm struggling. Been reading The Book Thief the rest of the afternoon

[Suzi]

Love that book!

Hmm, still a really physical activity when you need to listen to your body and rest....

[Jaquaia]

It's taken me a while to get into it but I'm enjoying it.

I know. To be honest, I told him to strip the bed as he mentioned it needed doing yesterday and I didn't feel like this yesterday. I was hoping he'd forgotten when I woke up... have to be up early tomorrow too as I have blood tests and then hospital with my mother.

[Paula]

Loved The Book Thief :)

[OldMike]

It's done now. My dad stripped it first thing and my mum sorted the washer. The OT taught us an easier way to put a quilt cover on so it's not as hard as it used to be if I'm struggling. Been reading The Book Thief the rest of the afternoon

Sounds an interesting book, I've just put an order in to Amazon for it :)

[Jaquaia]

It is interesting Mike. I've never read anything from the German perspective before.

Even better that it only cost me £2 (giggle)

[Jaquaia]

Well the fatigue isn't as bad as it was yesterday, still not great but I have a little more energy. J is concerned about my mood again, he's noticed it tends to drop a lot when I'm fatigued. So going to try and rest, though tempted to go and have a look through my books in the shed so I can actually start GoT...

[Jaquaia]

Some of you may have realised that I'm a huge Bluetones fan... well... MARK MORRISS JUST LIKED MY TWEET!!!!!!

*swoons*

[Suzi]

Well the fatigue isn't as bad as it was yesterday, still not great but I have a little more energy. J is concerned about my mood again, he's noticed it tends to drop a lot when I'm fatigued. So going to try and rest, though tempted to go and have a look through my books in the shed so I can actually start GoT...
Depression and fatigue are closely linked love.... You've not mentioned a mood drop here?

[OldMike]

Depression and fatigue are closely linked love.... You've not mentioned a mood drop here?

I agree totally depression can cause fatigue and fatigue can worsen depression, I'm sure when you see the Bluetones that will give you a boost.

[Jaquaia]

Depression and fatigue are closely linked love.... You've not mentioned a mood drop here?

It's just getting normal to me now

[Suzi]

But you were going to keep a note of them all? Are you still doing that?

[Jaquaia]

I have to confess that I haven't. It completely slipped my mind.

Had a really lovely day. J enjoyed his track experience then we went to the Castle Museum then to Pizza Hut for lunch then to the theatre. It's a scaffolding replica of the Globe Theatre
http://www.shakespearesrosetheatre.com/

Twelfth Night was absolutely incredible!!!! They updated it to the 1920's, added songs but kept Shakespeare's dialogue and it was brilliant! I laughed so much!

[Suzi]

Could you start one?

The pictures look awesome! So glad you love Twelfth Night!!

[Jaquaia]

Finishing the washing off but I'm so tired.

Apparently I'm getting another niece, my sister sent me a gender reveal video yesterday (I really don't get American culture creeping into everything) and then got home to my mum going on about it and as soon as my brother left she started going on about it again. J is pretty annoyed at my family's insensitivity, he thinks my sister could have been a bit more compassionate in how she told me since she knows how big a deal it is for me, but it's something I'm just going to have to get used to.

[Suzi]

Oh hunni..... I agree they could be a bit more sensitive, but I understand the excitement and the joy side of it too.... It's a tricky one.

[Paula]

I’m sorry it’s upset you but, sweetie, how would you have felt if they’d told everyone except you?

[Jaquaia]

It's not really. It will be how it's always been. Can't say anything to upset my sister and I come a long way behind. It's been like that for as long as I can remember.

He never said about not telling me, he said about being more compassionate. Wouldn't simply telling me "we're having a girl" be more compassionate then the huge song and dance that was made, why did I need the video sending to me?

It doesn't matter.

[Suzi]

Of course it matters!!!! It definitely matters!

[Jaquaia]

I made curry from scratch... tasted lovely but most of it went in the bin...

A tablespoon of hot chilli powder was a bit too much!!!

[Suzi]

OO yes! My boys like it that hot, but it's too much for me!
Well done on making it though!

[Paula]

Ouch lol, I used to love them hot but meds mean I’m a bit of a wus nowadays ;)

[Jaquaia]

I used to be able to eat them fairly hot too! Now I normally stick with butter chicken, korma or pasanda

[Suzi]

Lol! So what recipe were you using that called for the "kill-a-donkey" amount of chilli? (rofl)

How are you today?

[Jaquaia]

https://tasty-co.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/tasty.co/recipe/easy-homemade-chicken-curry?amp_js_v=a2&amp_gsa=1&usqp=mq331AQA#referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.co m&amp_tf=From%20%251%24s&ampshare=https%3A%2F%2Ftasty.co%2Frecipe%2Feasy-homemade-chicken-curry

I'm ok but tired. Going to do some reading for one of my new modules today, it will give me chance to try and get used to my pen grip too.

[Suzi]

Wow! That's a lot of spice!
Good for you, but make sure you pace too please....

[Jaquaia]

Yes. And it was hot chilli powder too, wouldn't have been so bad with mild (rofl)

I will try. I'd like to get a chapter read if I can

[Suzi]

I'm going to try and make it for my boys at the weekend and I'll report back ;)

[Jaquaia]

I used chilli flakes instead of fresh chilli so that may have increased the heat too as they had the seeds in (giggle)

Just done my hand exercises... really feeling it!!!!

[Suzi]

(rofl)(rofl)(rofl) re the Chillies!

Hand exercises are good then?

[Jaquaia]

My hands are a bit achey but hopefully they'll help.

And I paced. I read and took notes from 2 chapters then wemt back to Miss Peregrine and her peculiar children!

[Suzi]

I'm very proud! Pacing woohoo! :)

[Jaquaia]

Tried strawberry soya milk today.... my god that stuff is disgusting!!!

[Suzi]

Eww, I've obviously seen it, but just couldn't bring myself to try it - glad you have, so I now don't have to! :)

[Jaquaia]

It wasn't even pink!!!! More of a dirty beige colour!!!

[Suzi]

Ewwwwwwwwww!

[OldMike]

Tried strawberry soya milk today.... my god that stuff is disgusting!!!

Soya strawberry milk sounds okay to me even though I've never had it :)

[Jaquaia]

In theory, yes. In reality, noooooo!!!

[magie06]

That sounds so disgusting. I'm glad that we have a resident tester here, so we don't have to try these things! (rofl)

[Jaquaia]

It tasted like it hadn't even seen a strawberry!!!

[Suzi]

It probably hadn't! lol

[Angie]

Blend some strawberries and mix them into the normal soya milk or milk you use with some sugar if you want it

[Strugglingmum]

Im not a big flavoured milk lover however I use almond milk and I do like it blended with cold coffee. It's really refreshing. X

[Jaquaia]

I don't mind almond milk. I might have to try it with strawberry milkshake mix, I'd rather have water on my cereal then try soya again!

[Suzi]

Oat milk on cereal works well - as it does in tea/coffee/hot chocolate.
Coconut milk works well in things like overnight oats too!

[Jaquaia]

Oat milk was out of stock this week, ended up with sweetened almond milk as the unsweetened was out of stock too.

Cutting out dairy has made a huge difference, I seem to be ok with tiny amounts, but the only time I now seem to have issues is when I've eaten something containing dairy.

[Suzi]

I found it made a huge difference to me too...

[Strugglingmum]

Made a huge difference to me. I use unsweetened almond milk in my coffee and on my cereal. I take my tea black or have green tea. The thing I miss most is beautiful cheese. However, its just not worth the pain (well sometimes it is(giggle))

[Jaquaia]

Learned how to do a rolling stop this morning, it was a really good lesson and I enjoyed getting behind the wheel again after a weeks break! Hoovered the full house and given the bathroom a quick once over, going to reward myself with the afternoon reading now.

Thought I'd share this. This is my middle finger without my splint...
https://www.dropbox.com/s/wpoj74b3mtktrt3/USER_SCOPED_TEMP_DATA_MSGR_PHOTO_FOR_UPLOAD_156526 2326673.jpeg?raw=1

And my middle finger with my splint...
https://www.dropbox.com/s/ilcqejxat40hzhf/USER_SCOPED_TEMP_DATA_MSGR_PHOTO_FOR_UPLOAD_156526 2342944.jpeg?raw=1

[magie06]

That looks very painful.

[Jaquaia]

It's actually not painful at all. I never even noticed it until the OT pointed it out. It's known as a swan neck deformity and is due to the RA. If left untreated it would end up like this... https://www.gponline.com/glance-swan-neck-deformity-vs-boutonniere-deformity/article/1019649

[Suzi]

Is it comfortable with the finger splints?

Hooray for driving! Well done for hoovering - but did you have to do the whole house in one go?
I'm glad you're pacing this afternoon though!

[Jaquaia]

I struggle if my fingers are swollen as they get tight and they're not fun when it's hot as they're hard plastic. I'm going to get them in silver at some point though so they look like jewellery rather than a medical device. They do work though, they stop the joint dropping.

[Suzi]

Glad they help lovely x

[Jaquaia]

Just finished Regeneration by Pat Barker. It feels wrong to say I enjoyed it but it was brilliantly written.

[Suzi]

OO haven't come across that one yet...

[Jaquaia]

I read part of it as part of the WW1 literature section of my eng lit a level. It's the first part of a trilogy and beautifully written.

[Suzi]

I'll look out for it. Thanks love.

How are you today? What plans have you got?

[Jaquaia]

I'm not sure yet. Might do some more pre-reading for uni

[Suzi]

Sounds fun!

[Jaquaia]

My books start getting sent out next week so it will be good to start getting into the habit

[Suzi]

It will x How's your day been?

[Jaquaia]

Well I ended up just digging a book out. And J is taking me to the bookshop in Pickering tomorrow so working out how much I have to spend!!!

[Suzi]

Woohoo! At least then he can carry them!

[Jaquaia]

Google Yorkshire Quality Paperback and have a look at some of the photos. It's like heaven!!!!! (inlove)

[Suzi]

OMG That's just like Foyle's used to be in the centre of London! I loved it in there!

[Jaquaia]

None of the books are more than £3 either!!! I paid £1.75 for To Kill a Mockingbird!!!

[Suzi]

Oh wow! That is the most amazing shop!

[Jaquaia]

I will post a pic of my haul! (giggle)

[Suzi]

Oh please do! :)

[Jaquaia]

£43 between me and J... considering 3 of my books were £1 and nothing is more than £3, you can imagine how many we bought! (giggle)

[Suzi]

That's awesome!

[Jaquaia]

Suzi!!!

https://www.dropbox.com/s/7it26bps5h4qtow/20190811_210210.jpg?raw=1

Spent a lovely evening at his parents, I sat talking to them while he went and painted a model and we ended up talking about possibilities for the wedding and his mum suggesting places to try for an engagement ring! Think they've accepted me? (giggle)

No idea why the photo has loaded upside down...

[Suzi]

That's a great haul!
Catcher in the Rye is cool! That Stephen King is brilliant...... I've read Rebecca too!

[Jaquaia]

I've never gotten around to reading them!

[Mira]

That Stephen King book is the only one I managed to read in the last few years. I loved it.

And from what I can tell you are not only accepted but already part of the family. I think they can tell how happy you are making there son.

[Suzi]

Mira is right, you are loved and wanted in their family!

[Jaquaia]

I even felt comfortable enough to give his dad grief back when he was teasing me about being from east Hull!

[magie06]

Of course you're accepted. Who wouldn't accept you? You are kind, thoughtful, caring, friendly, loving, cheerful! Will I go on??? Okay then, sharing, bright, brilliant, able, adventurous, capable, decisive, fabulous, agreeable.
Jaq you are just you and everyone loves you for that.

[Jaquaia]

I'm blushing now!!! I really don't see that I'm anything special.

We were putting cupboards together for his workshop yesterday and he made a mistake, he hammered the dowel in a bit too far and it went through the side. He said he found it really weird that he wasn't being shouted at and it was strange that he didn't feel in the least bit stressed doing that with me. I just love that we can do the everyday boring stuff and still enjoy being around each other. I enjoyed sitting and talking to his parents while he painted a model for the museum and I feel comfortable in the village too.

[magie06]

That's an awesome post. IMO you feel at home when you're with your soul mate and I think in J you've found yours.

[Jaquaia]

I think so too. It's 2 years next month (though officially just over a year) and I still can't help but smile when I hear his car pull up, I still get excited when I get to see him and I still get butterflies. I am completely myself around him, he knows my vulnerabilities too, it's very rare I feel comfortable enough to let someone see that side of me.

[OldMike]

It's so easy to hammer those dowels in a bit too far when you're assembling flat pack stuff I've done it's annoying but not the end of the world.

[Suzi]

I LOVE the last few posts!!!!! I'm so pleased for you both!

[Jaquaia]

I absolutely adore him and my mum has said that it's obvious that he feels exactly the same (inlove)

I'll let you know when to buy a hat ;)

[Paula]

I’ve been looking over the last weeks posts and am beaming :) they’re so, so positive and full of pride in your new life

[Jaquaia]

I am truly happy for probably the first time in my life and it doesn't matter how bad my head gets, I know he will be there no matter what. He is probably the only man I've ever felt completely safe with and I know he will support me no matter what I choose to do. It's hard not to feel positive when you have someone constantly telling you that they believe in you and are behind you no matter what (inlove)

[Suzi]

That's such a monumentally awesome post!

[Jaquaia]

Just been emailed my course handbook ready for September... cue panic!!! I'm going to be a nervous wreck before my first class!!!

[Suzi]

You are not going to panic - you don't need to. You've got this and we're with you. Every step of the way.

[Jaquaia]

Well I've dealt with an issue with the suggested reading, they gave the wrong author for one of the books but it's all sorted now. And I have access to one of the books online through the uni library so can start it while I get a copy

[Suzi]

Well done lovely!

[Jaquaia]

Mood is sliding, people are annoying me and I'm irritable. All I want to eat is chocolate and I have stomach ache... Hibernating until the weekend me thinks!

[Suzi]

(panda) Are you keeping note of your mood? I assume it's TOTM? Are you noticing the slide each time? Is it something you could talk to your GP about?

[Jaquaia]

I need to get organised hence me putting it here. If I don't notice it, J does. And yes it is. I haven't had one 5 weeks apart in nearly 2 years so I'm wondering if I've lost a bit more weight.

[Suzi]

Could be...

[Jaquaia]

I really enjoyed my driving lesson this morning! Everything felt so much better and I was about 95% independent too! We worked on my gear changes too as 2nd gear has been a struggle and everything just felt so much better by the end!

[Suzi]

That's so positive! I'm loving the positivity right now! :)

[Jaquaia]

I can have a laugh with Bob and it makes it so much easier to relax and enjoy it. When I think of how I was when I first started... I'm actually impressed with just how far I've come!

[Paula]

Well done :). Have you put in for the theory?

[Jaquaia]

Not yet. I really need to focus on that.

[Jaquaia]

Stereophonics new album pre-ordered, folders and dividers ordered for my next modules and bought one of the suggested books for my level 1. J is worried that he's upset me as my mood isn't right and it's concerning him and is it bedtime yet?

[Suzi]

It's very nearly bedtime in my house!
What's causing the mood issues?

[Jaquaia]

Probably TOTM. I'm really irritable and just want to be left alone with my book but then I'm struggling to concentrate for any length of time

[Paula]

(panda)

[Suzi]

Morning gorgeous, how are you this morning?

[Jaquaia]

Tired, low, frustrating the hell out of J as I won't actually admit I'm feeling low even though he can read me like a book. Going to get up soon and got take meds/eat/drink, I just really can't be bothered

[Paula]

Why on earth won’t you admit it to him?

[Jaquaia]

Stubborness, not wanting to worry him, not being used to someone worrying about me, stubborness...

[Paula]

And yet you tell him off for doing the same thing ....

[Jaquaia]

I embrace hypocrisy...


... and I don't think I'm as important...

[Paula]

You are so very important, to so many people

[Jaquaia]

I don't understand why. And I know that's because I'm probably struggling to get past my view of myself

[Paula]

At least you’re recognising that your view of yourself might not be correct ...

[Jaquaia]

I keep telling J that everyone can't be wrong so I have to apply that to myself really don't I?

[Paula]

Yeap ;)

[Suzi]

Tired, low, frustrating the hell out of J as I won't actually admit I'm feeling low even though he can read me like a book. Going to get up soon and got take meds/eat/drink, I just really can't be bothered
But how would you feel if roles were reversed?

And yet you tell him off for doing the same thing ....
Exactly..

I embrace hypocrisy...


... and I don't think I'm as important...
You ARE important - to him, to us, to your friends, to so many people....

You are so very important, to so many people
Look, Paula agrees, we can't both be wrong...

I keep telling J that everyone can't be wrong so I have to apply that to myself really don't I?
Absolutely. It's about time that you stopped, breathed and started to believe that you aren't all that you think of yourself and that actually there are people who love you, who want to be there for you and who wants to know everything about you and what's going on in your head - besides, if you don't tell him, imagine what he thinks might actually be wrong....... I promise you, you don't want that for him. I've been there and I know where your head goes...

[Jaquaia]

He's already smug that Paula agrees with him!!!!

I was talking to Bob on Thursday and he said he thinks I'm lovely and he'd be happy to be friends with me away from lessons. He also said that I'm a very strong person inside, I offer so much support to others but when it comes to myself I tend to freeze and flap a bit. I don't think I can disagree with him really...

I've promised J that I will try harder to tell him when I'm struggling

[Suzi]

So now he can be extra smug!

[Jaquaia]

He is!!!!

[Suzi]

Good! :)

[Jaquaia]

We're going book shopping!!!! (party)

Well I am running low on books (giggle)

[Suzi]

One of my favourite pastimes! Enjoy yourself!

[Jaquaia]

https://www.dropbox.com/s/5t8kdc4h8eetj2v/FB_IMG_1566123781809.jpg?raw=1

We were supposed to be moving all his books ready for painting and just added to the problem instead (giggle)

[Suzi]

OO those look fantastic!
Having fun then?

[Jaquaia]

Moved about a thousand books but it's nice just spending a decent amount of time with him :)

[Suzi]

Are those becoming your "to read" pile?

[Jaquaia]

(giggle) he's having the living room painted so they all needed moving so the decorator could move the bookcases

[Suzi]

Sounds like he has a library! That's like that bit in Beauty and the Beast where he gives his love one of her greatest things - his library! :) *sings "Tale as old as time"...*

[Paula]

Katies favourite film - she says her wedding will have hints of Belle in it ;)

[Jaquaia]

Sounds like he has a library! That's like that bit in Beauty and the Beast where he gives his love one of her greatest things - his library! :) *sings "Tale as old as time"...*

Except he would never give me his library!!!! They're all railway books too!!!


Katies favourite film - she says her wedding will have hints of Belle in it ;)

My friends is getting married next year and they're having a disney themed wedding!

[Flo]

How are things with Le Man Jaq? Any closer to a conclusion?

[Jaquaia]

He emailed the solicitor today to ask if they have any idea of a completion date

[Suzi]

Hopefully soon! It always amazes me how long things take...

[Jaquaia]

Well last night we ordered a carpet and a new sofa together and the decorator is in this week to sort the living room out. I've told him he needs to declutter and sort out as things go back and start boxing her stuff up. I think he's listened so far...

[Suzi]

OOOO choosing carpets and sofas?! That's awesome!

[Jaquaia]

A dark grey carpet and a charcoal and black sofa. The walls are being painted a really light grey and pale green. I just want to make it a home for him.

We didn't do much really, just more of the everyday boring stuff but I loved it. I felt so peaceful and content. Saturday we went up to the bookshop in Pickering and took the extra scenic route home, he cooked for me and we put the rest of the cupboards together for his workshop then just curled up on the sofa. He found it weird that I wasn't bothered by him writing for his blog, but the way I see it, we can spend time together without doing exactly the same thing. I was happy enough just sitting with him and binge watching Black Books, I didn't need his undivided attention. Sunday we moved his books and popped into Hull to buy some storage for the workshop then went to his parents. Yet these past few days are the most peaceful I've felt in a long time. I feel so happy and content and not as closed in. And I've slept a lot better too. I settle so much better with him.

[Suzi]

It's the boring and everyday things that make relationships.

[Jaquaia]

I can't wait to share more of the boring everyday things with him (inlove)

[Suzi]

I know lovely... Hope it is really soon x

[Jaquaia]

He's worth the wait. It's hard, very hard at times, but he's my soulmate. I frustrate the hell out him at times and he does me, but we've come through so much over the last 2 years, we can get through anything together.

[Suzi]

Awww you're so sweet! I'm so pleased for you! You sound genuinely happy and "centred" itms?

[Jaquaia]

I am genuinely happy, for probably the first time in my life. I think I'm much more focused with him. He is so supportive of whatever I want to do and is always offering encouragement. He can manage my moods pretty well, I mean he's like a dog with a bone and will not leave me alone until I actually tell him what's wrong and then gets really smug when he finds out he guessed right! He can read me like a book and isn't afraid of telling me when my mood is concerning him. Sunday was pretty rough at times yet he just made me snuggle up on the sofa as he knew that was what I needed.

He doesn't want me caring for my mum once I move in either as he thinks caring like I am now and full time study, counselling qualifications and driving in and out of Hull several times a week with how my head can be, will be too much for me. I'm inclined to think he's right as I struggle now and I live in the same house!

I'm not used to someone looking after me and putting me first, but what I do know, no matter how my head can be, everything just feels right with the world when I'm with him. It all probably sounds really soppy but he makes me feel so, so loved.

[Suzi]

I'm glad he is helping you see what it's like to be loved.
What is the plan for your Mum? Get SS to get carers in for her?

[Jaquaia]

If I'm honest, she could probably do a bit more than she currently does. She has no active disease in her hands now, just some in her wrists. Her rheumatologist did ultrasounds yesterday. She has plenty of aids to protect her joints and there are plenty available. My dad is here, so he could do some of the things I do and my sister works part time, she could actually help.

One of my worries is Talia. I can't take her with me to J's as she hates cats and J has a cat...

[Paula]

I’m glad you’re not planning on caring for your mum. You’re moving forward with your life now and you need to focus on that. As you say, there are other options.

WRT Talia, I know you took her on as there was no other option at the time so how do you feel about not having her in your life? I was thinking maybe it would be best if you looked for a good rescue centre that would find a new home for her. I know it sounds tough but if you don’t think she’ll get the care she needs with your parents, it could be your best option. Or, I don’t even know if they do it, but could you see if a centre would look for a home while she’s still living with you, sort of as a foster, and then she might not need to go into kennels

[Jaquaia]

I would miss her but I'm not a dog person and she prefers my mum anyway. I can see me getting absolutely slated about not being able to take her too. I don't know what to do really. I'd probably be expected to put my life on hold by certain members of my family...

[Paula]

Hunni, you do know what to do, it just might mean some confrontation .....

[Suzi]

I agree with Paula. Could your Mum really cope with her? What about when she messes during the night etc? I am a dog person, but I also know my own limitations and what would be fair on the dogs in my care etc....

I think you need to put YOU first and, quite frankly, f*ck what abyone else might think....

[Jaquaia]

To be honest, I feel completely stuck. I only took her on as my mum wanted her as she was attached to her. My sister and b-i-l are talking about getting a dog but they won't want Talia. Anyway, it's not something I need to think about just yet as it will be a while before I move in. I will look at my options though.

She's at the vets for her boosters tomorrow. I also need to get them to investigate a lump...

[Suzi]

Oh I'm sorry about the lump...

[Jaquaia]

Hopefully it's just a fatty lump. I'll ask them tomorrow.

[Suzi]

Hope so lovely...

[Jaquaia]

I'm currently curtain shopping. J has asked me to email his mum with suggestions.

[Suzi]

Lol! I love that you are helping to redecorate and get rid of her :)

[Jaquaia]

He said he wants me to feel comfortable there as it's going to be our home so he wants my input (inlove)

I told his dad that I was making him start to box her stuff up...

"GOOD!!! It's a shame it's not the 5th of November..." (giggle)

[Suzi]

I like his thinking! Although unceremoniously dumping it in her front garden might be just as satisfying!

[Jaquaia]

Well the vet doesn't think the lump is anything to worry about but to keep an eye on it. If it gets bigger then they can put a needle in to draw out some cells and get it tested. They're getting the nurses to work out cost and ring me so I know how much I'll be looking at. Talia was actually really good! Didn't bark at any other dogs, was actually decent on the lead and was good with the vet.

[Paula]

Do you pay for Talia then?

[Jaquaia]

My dad often insists on paying. I need to look at insurance really but I don't even know where to start.

[Paula]

Petplan are possibly the most well known but not the cheapest. Others include Aviva - there’s loads of insurers out there at all different levels of costs but it may be better to look at the monthly cost and just put that money to one side. Though that does become an issue when big bills come eg if she’s seriously ill or has an accident. One thing you’ll need to look at is whether they’ll pay for ongoing medication - for arthritis etc

[Jaquaia]

She's fairly healthy, just a little chunky... and she's starting to get old now. I'm noticing white hairs on her face. I will look next time I have my laptop out. Think she's had all the excitement she can take for one day as she's snoring her head off!

[magie06]

Is she agressive towards cats? The only reason I ask is my neighbours have both a cat and a dog and they get along great together. Maybe, J's cat and 'your' dog might do the same.

[Jaquaia]

She hates cats and J doesn't think the cat will accept another animal in the house

[Suzi]

I'm so glad they don't think it's anything to worry about!
We looked at insurance but it's a minefield! So many to choose from and so many which are so similar! And so many different reviews!

[Jaquaia]

The booster seems to have knocked her out a bit, she's been asleep all day.

[Suzi]

Aww! Must be the excitement of the day!

[Jaquaia]

I did new roads!!!! And more roundabouts!!! And it went really well and I'm so pleased with myself right now!!!

[Suzi]

Woohoo! Positivity always!

[Jaquaia]

I did panic a little but I dealt with it a lot better than I thought I would. My speed was good, I was judging gaps better, my gear changes were smoother, junctions worked well and I learnt a downhill start.

I'm going to reward myself with a night out to see Idlewild and the Doves ;)

[Paula]

(party)

[Suzi]

Hooray! Enjoy your night out!

[Jaquaia]

They were AMAZING!!!! My back and hip are so stiff from standing all evening now but so worth it!

[Suzi]

So glad you had a good time! :)

[Jaquaia]

Done a couple of mock tests... 27 and 35...

Eek! Really need to finish reading the bloody highway code!!!

[Suzi]

Have you booked it?

[Jaquaia]

No not yet. I would only panic at the moment. I need to work on the theory and will book it when I feel more comfortable

[Suzi]

Good plan!

[Jaquaia]

Well my brother got engaged over the weekend to a lovely, lovely person. She's a primary school teacher and she loves books! My dads first reaction was "well I aren't buying a suit". So you know that when we plan our wedding I'm going to tell my dad it's a morning suit, right up to the point they go and buy them. If he wants to give me away, he'll surely want to make me happy?? (devil)

[magie06]

Congratulations to the happy couple.
When I got married we rented the suits for the lads, including the dads. We even hired the shirts. Is that an option for you?

[Jaquaia]

Probably. It's more that I want to wind my dad up, he hates wearing suits, he'll hate a morning suit even more!!!

[Suzi]

Congratulations to your brother!
(rofl) to winding up your Dad!

[Jaquaia]

He's got it coming. Our wedding days are about us joining with the people we want to share our lives with. Surely wearing a suit and tie until the photos at least are done isn't too much to ask?

[Suzi]

Hey I wore heels for mine ;) Well, I wore them out of the flat, to the registry office, down the aisle, for the photos and then to the car. There I took them off and didn't put them back on again!

[Jaquaia]

Not sure why I'm even looking yet as it's a long way off but I've seen an amazing pair of low heeled boots!

[Suzi]

Doesn't hurt to window shop ;)

[magie06]

Do we need to start looking for hats?? ;)

[Strugglingmum]

My friend wore gorgeous boots from Irregular Choice. They were really lovely in ivory. Like old fashioned granny boots...... if that is still a term anyone understands.!! ;)

[Jaquaia]

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B071D5J7GZ/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_J8ezDbBJYBTQK

I think these are gorgeous! (inlove)

Eventually magie but it's a long way off yet!

[Strugglingmum]

Oooooo they are gorgeous!!!

[Suzi]

They are stunning!