View Full Version : Trials and tribulations of a Yorkshire pudding
Those are tough moments for sure. In my family there are a few alcoholics. And I have heard all the stories of why they drink but they are addicted.
Sometimes I feel your father is being self destructive. And what you said about what if you had that attitude resonates with me. I have the same. If I said after seeing 3 therapists I am done who knows what would be of me now....
Its important to keep trying. Its a shame your father does not see that. And like you said there is so much to be around for. You did forget to mention yourself. So I am doing that now.
Its a shame there is so much negativty around you at home at the moment. But please dont feel bad about making uni a priority. (panda)
It might be an idea to point out that they need to get their act together, because you aren't going to be there for much longer. If they don't help themselves it's not your responsibility Jaq. You have a life of your own and in the not too distant future you'll be living with J. What will they do then? Thank the Lord they have you there to help with everything. Blow the baking! I'm all for helping parents but not to the extent that it compromises my own well being. Any driving test on the horizon yet?
Jaquaia
26-05-19, 08:20 AM
Nowhere near yet Flo, but I am driving pretty independently and feel pretty comfortable behind the wheel
I agree with the others love. Maybe you need to tell them how you are feeling....
Jaquaia
26-05-19, 10:07 AM
I've learned the hard way that it never makes a difference.
As Flo says, maybe you need to emphasise that you will be moving out soon and they need to find a way to help themselves.
I think Flo and Paula are right. I think you're going to have to slowly pass things back to them.... Training them to be self sufficient...
Nowhere near yet Flo, but I am driving pretty independently and feel pretty comfortable behind the wheel
That's the most important thing...feeling confident and competent. It won't be long now!;)
Jaquaia
26-05-19, 03:25 PM
I have been getting pretty blunt with my mum and getting my brother to back me up when he comes down. It doesn't do much good as she claims "she forgot"... As for moving out, I think I'm looking at a good year before that happens. But I am starting to have a life at least, J has been so good for me in that respect.
But I am starting to have a life at least, J has been so good for me in that respect.
Excuse me, missus! You’ve changed his life. When you think where he was a year ago, under her thumb, unable to leave, tormented, desperately unhappy? Hunni, you’ve done so much more for him than he’s done for you. Do not underestimate what you’ve done in his life
Jaquaia
26-05-19, 06:59 PM
That's a lovely thing to say (blush)
I don't think I'm anything special. I just love him and want him to be happy. He gives me so much love, encouragement and support. I'm not sure I could have done half of what I've done over the last year without that.
You ARE special. You don't have to change the world for everyone, but you have changed his world and that of the children.......
Can you set your Mum up reminders on her phone? Write it down on a white board where she can see it?
Jaquaia
26-05-19, 08:02 PM
I need to sit and sort that out as dosette boxes aren't doing much good...
IS she taking too much or not enough?
Jaquaia
26-05-19, 10:06 PM
As far as I'm aware, she's taken her longtec at different times even though I've explained they need to be taken at the exact same times every day as they're slow release over 12 hours. She's taking some without eating when they should be taken with food and then wonders why she feels sick. Told her that countless times too... Her hearing aid needs adjusting and I've been reminding her to make the appointment for 2 years almost... oh and the latest one is her legs have extremely dry skin. They look a mess, and because they itch, she scratches, they bleed and then get infected. She has a cream to use sparingly twice a day, and a moisturiser as needed. She complained her back hurts when she bends to do it so I told her to ask me. "It's embarrassing". I can understand that so I bought her a long-handled lotion applicator so she can do it herself without bending. That's a tenner wasted as she's used it once. I remind her constantly, "I forgot". I repeat the doctors instructions constantly and it gets me nowhere. I've told her a few times not to even bother asking me to get her an appointment if her legs get infected again as it's her own fault. If she can't follow instructions on how to care for her legs yet keep going back for the same thing then she's wasting their time and mine as she's caused her own problems by not helping herself. Harsh I know, all I can say is I'm rapidly running out of patience with her. She doesn't even use any of the equipment the OT gave her. Yet she got seen quickly and I've had to wait a year as they had no space...
I can understand why you are struggling with everything.... Is it that she genuinely has forgotten?
Jaquaia
27-05-19, 09:37 AM
A lot of the time I think it's a convenient excuse as I've reminded her hundreds of times
Maybe you have to be cruel to be kind and leave her to it with alarms set or something?
Maybe you have to be cruel to be kind and leave her to it with alarms set or something?
I was about to say the same thing ....
Jaquaia
27-05-19, 05:41 PM
I'll set them up once my essay is out the way
I think you might have to. She needs training ;)
Jaquaia
27-05-19, 09:37 PM
She needs something :@
About half way through my essay and have absolutely zero motivation.
Jaquaia
27-05-19, 09:51 PM
Tomorrow....
Jaquaia
28-05-19, 10:24 AM
Showered and what not. Going to sort my hair out and crack open my laptop. I know what I need to write, most of my conclusion is written... just 600 words on monkeys and driving while using a mobile to go!
I think that’s unfair on monkeys ;)
Jaquaia
28-05-19, 10:56 AM
(giggle)
Jaquaia
28-05-19, 01:52 PM
I feel like I've done loads since half 10 yet I've only just passed 1000 words!
Jaquaia
28-05-19, 02:00 PM
So far I've written about Nazi's, the Nuremberg code and shocking people with increasing voltage when they get a question wrong... this should be interesting to write!
Jaquaia
28-05-19, 07:03 PM
Took a break to spend some time with J. 300 words to go and then a read through and edit. Should be fine.
Well done love! You can do it!
Jaquaia
28-05-19, 10:13 PM
Submitted!!! (party)
I may have taken advantage of the 10% margin... 1644 words...(giggle)
Well done love! What's on today's agenda?
Jaquaia
29-05-19, 11:29 AM
Going to go see Scarlett today. I've bought her a couple of books. I can cope with feeling unwelcome for a couple of hours...
You aren't going to see anyone else - just Scarlett. F what the others think! :)
Jaquaia
29-05-19, 11:53 AM
I'm sat reading about a unicorn that grants wishes to a rocking horse!
You aren't going to see anyone else - just Scarlett. F what the others think! :)
Exactly. She wants to see you!
Jaquaia
29-05-19, 01:09 PM
Where's Mr Duck? (Felt Flaps) https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1788003675/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_xzN7Cb31B9AJX
I've read it about 20 times so far! Good choice by me I think
Jaquaia
30-05-19, 11:34 AM
That was a really good driving lesson! I even did a new area and mini roundabouts. Doing a new area raised my anxiety but I dealt with it. My second circuit was much better than my first, doing the roundabout from a different direction threw me though and I stalled and then panicked. Overall it was good though!
Sounds like you're coming on leaps and bounds! It's so lovely to hear you talking about it with such excitement!
Jaquaia
30-05-19, 12:44 PM
Bob has commented a few times on how much progress I've made. I'm driving pretty much independently and mostly feel comfortable behind the wheel now. He's teaching me to drive, not to pass a test , and the fact that he's willing to repeat everything is helping me so much.
Jaquaia
30-05-19, 02:49 PM
You maybe won't be if I tell you that when we parked up and was discussing the lesson, we were talking about the roundabout, except I forgot the word for roundabout so I pointed over my shoulder and said one of those (giggle)
Jaquaia
30-05-19, 03:20 PM
I like how he teaches me. I've just said this to Sarah, but because he is happy to repeat lessons over and over, I can now drive a 2 and a half mile circuit in both directions with no input from him. That's 2 roundabouts, a big bus route, variable speed limits (though admittedly, I don't get much about 25 at the moment...) and currently, temporary traffic lights. If I need something explaining again, he will get me to pull over and go through things. If he asks me something, he wants to know the answer and why that is the answer, to prove I fully understand. He's teaching me to drive and not to pass a test. He even offered to give me extra country driving lessons when I told him where J lives as he said I'll need it.
He sounds exactly what you need!
Ooh! He sounds great! When I first came over to the uk in 1971 I had an instructor who looked like one of the prison wardens in Cool Hand Luke (Paul Newman) he wore mirror sunglasses and was an absolute B'tard!! The next one I had was a sweetie and really easy to get along with and had a great sense of humour. So when is Bob taking you to Paris to try driving there?(giggle) It's full of maniacs with a death wish!! I've never driven abroad, and never want to. Well done though. Has he got a postage stamp in the middle of his rear window?
Morning love, how are you?
Jaquaia
31-05-19, 11:47 AM
He's brilliant Flo. So pleased everyone encouraged me to change instructors as it's the best thing I could have done.
I'm ok Suzi. Tired. Have popped to the shops, needed a birthday card for my brother. Doing a couple of washes though I'm not going to do it all today but going to spread it out. And have hoovered the stairs, landing, bathroom and give my bedroom floor a quick once over. I'm going to go wrap my brothers presents and then rest.
I’m impressed! That might actually be called pacing ;)
Jaquaia
31-05-19, 12:11 PM
I'd say I learnt from the best but I'd be lying. You lot are rubbish at it! (giggle)
(rofl) do what we say, not what we do!
Jaquaia
31-05-19, 01:11 PM
(giggle)
Pfft, we are the best people to ask as we are still working through it ;)
Jaquaia
31-05-19, 08:09 PM
I need to stop looking at postgrad study!!! Seen another Doctoral course I wouldn't mind doing but it's going to cost nearly £25 grand!!! :o
OldMike
31-05-19, 09:17 PM
I need to stop looking at postgrad study!!! Seen another Doctoral course I wouldn't mind doing but it's going to cost nearly £25 grand!!! :o
Wow that sure is expensive, but if it is what you want then go for it.
Jaquaia
31-05-19, 09:40 PM
I don't know what I want really, other then to try and help people. I need to weigh up if I can do that better as a counsellor or as a counselling psychologist.
Maybe focus on what you are doing now and see how that goes? ;)
Jaquaia
31-05-19, 10:55 PM
I get restless and agitated if I don't have a plan. I have no idea why, I just find life easier if I have a rough idea of where I'm going
But surely your plan is to do this next years courses?
Jaquaia
31-05-19, 11:45 PM
I've always planned a few years in advance. I knew what degree I wanted to do before I even started my A-levels. I don't know why I do it, maybe it's partly because I'm never fully happy with anything I do.
Then make sure you aren't pushing yourself too hard love....
Jaquaia
01-06-19, 08:36 AM
Would I??? (angel)
If it helps, I'm thinking of doing my MSc before my PhD or DCounPsy as I think a gradual step up from undergrad to postgrad study would be better for me.
Even if you plan that far ahead because you are never completly happy about how you are doing I do think its great how you are doing. You are doing all that work and with such good results. That is something I can only commend you for.
Jaquaia
01-06-19, 01:33 PM
Well I get my results in July so will see how well I've done then.
Have finished the washing, will do bedding at some point over the next few days. Waiting for my brother to pop down for his presents but starting to get agitated being sat downstairs...
Are you pacing? Can you disappear for a while?
Jaquaia
01-06-19, 08:34 PM
I'm binge watching Good Omens. I really like it so far, David Tennant and Martin Sheen are brilliant!
I haven't read the book, but I've got the series to watch ;)
Jaquaia
01-06-19, 08:40 PM
I haven't read the book either!
Jaquaia
01-06-19, 09:05 PM
"I got pulled over by aliens!"
"Did you count their nipples?"
(rofl)(rofl)(rofl)
Jaquaia
01-06-19, 10:26 PM
I can tell I have a sore throat, I've actually drank today...
Oh I'm sorry you've got a sore throat, but I'm glad you've been drinking!
Jaquaia
02-06-19, 12:39 PM
Still sore and have a tickly cough. So I'm going to rest and maybe start my mums cross stitch today. I haven't gone to my sisters as there's a newborn in the house, her bf niece and her son are staying with them.
Hope you're drinking loads love....
Jaquaia
02-06-19, 01:30 PM
I'm trying to.
Doing this, because as a beginner, I don't believe in making things easy for myself...
Tiger Head Complete Counted Cross Stitch Kit 10" x 9.5" A2162 https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0033777O4/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apap_YaGwlQUq7VT4e
Jaquaia
02-06-19, 01:41 PM
I bought my mum it for Christmas but she can't do it because of her hands so I'm doing it.
Speaking of hands, I've finally got an appointment with the rheumatology OT. I have my assessment at half 1 tomorrow
Woohoo! Hope it goes well!
OldMike
02-06-19, 01:57 PM
That looks brilliant if you need any tips on cross stitch there's our very own Princess who I'm sure will enlighten you ;)
Jaquaia
02-06-19, 02:11 PM
I think the only tip I really need is about the aida. It's really stiff and was a battle to get it on my hoop.
That’s beautiful! And 14 count is a sensible Aida to start with. The only way I’ve found with stiff Aida is to keep working with it - sorry I know that’s no help at all
Jaquaia
02-06-19, 04:29 PM
It's starting to get easier, or the little bit I'm working on is anyway!
It does slightly give a bit as you work into that area. It's a bugger, but it's the only thing I've found....
Jaquaia
02-06-19, 05:42 PM
I ended up bring the aida and hoop down, putting it all on the chest freezer, and using my body and arm to keep the outer hoop down while I used a knife to fasten it up! (rofl)
Or maybe you could just buy some more Aida? It’s cheap.... the only thing is, you shouldn’t keep the Aida in the hoop when you’re not using it as it damages it and also means you end up with a permanent hoop shaped crease
Jaquaia
02-06-19, 07:57 PM
I don't. I always take it out once I've finished for the day. :)
It's ok to work on once it's in the hoop, it's just getting it there in the first place! I feel like I've done loads but it's maybe 2 square inches and that's it!
Good girl ;);)
An experienced cross stitcher apparently averages 1 square inch per hour....
Jaquaia
02-06-19, 10:58 PM
That's taken me about 4 hours today. I find it really relaxing though.
There you go - I’ve been doing it since I was 10 and can’t get a whole lot faster than that.....
And me.... Slow and steady wins the race and all that....
Jaquaia
03-06-19, 08:39 AM
My mum was surprised she may have to wait months for it until I showed her how much I'd done.
I have a headache, think it's the coughing that's caused it. So other then my OT appointment, I promise that I will rest.
I'm glad you're going to rest.
Jaquaia
03-06-19, 02:32 PM
Well!!! That was fun!
It turns out that my hand position isn't normal! I've not been able to comfortably straighten my hands for years. The 1st knuckles on my middle and ring fingers on my right hand are starting to drop so I have some rather attractive ring type things to wear during the day. I have compression gloves to wear on a night to help reduce sweling and stiffness. I have compression gloves that help ease stiffness and pain through gloves. And I have wrist supports for when I'm doing stuff too. I'm also starting a group that will teach me how to manage the RA, hand exercises and stuff to help in the kitchen etc. And she's going to refer me to the physio to get my hip and shoulders looked at.
At least you're getting some help now love... How long's the wait for the group and the physio?
Jaquaia
03-06-19, 05:30 PM
That should be gloves that help reduce pain and stiffness through heat, not gloves...
She's put me in for the group starting the 9th July, so not long. It's a swan neck deformity I have starting, but it's in the very early stages, hence the rather attractive ring things I posted on fb (giggle) She's doing the referral to the physio then, as there's a physio as part of the group. She seemed surprised that nothing has been done about my hip and that I wasn't referred for physio for my shoulders.
Oh hunni :(
I'm actually ok about it. I won't need to use the heat gloves often as I don't have flare ups that often. And the deformity has been caught really early so it can be easily treated
It is good that things have been caught early lovely. What does J say about it all? Your parents?
Jaquaia
03-06-19, 08:44 PM
My mum and dad haven't really said much and I don't really want to discuss it with my mum as it always turns into a bloody competition. J said he'll be there to help in any way he can :)
Though I think if I have to wear the splints long term, I'm going to buy some nice ones that look like jewellery! Maybe something like these; http://ringsplintsbyzomile.co.uk/homeabout/4582132650
OldMike
03-06-19, 09:18 PM
Yup those look really good, it's good someone has had the foresight to produce something that does a good job medically while looking good.
Good idea! :) They look fab!
Jaquaia
05-06-19, 02:09 PM
Woke up to the news that Tom's cancer is back. He starts immunotherapy tomorrow, and if that doesn't work, he'll be back on chemo.
Oh hunni, I'm so sorry....
OldMike
05-06-19, 04:49 PM
(bear) (panda)
Jaquaia
05-06-19, 05:15 PM
He's a fighter. I just wish he could get a break.
Sweetheart, I so sorry (panda)
That is such rough news to recieve.indeed he does deservr a break (panda)
How are you coping with it?
Jaquaia
05-06-19, 09:29 PM
Sad but he's a fighter. He's beat it once and he can do it again. He has so much love and support behind him.
Anyone want a cold? Done nothing but cough and sneeze all day. J doesn't like how my cough sounds and wants me to get it looked at. I don't think my dad does either as he told my mum to get me some cough syrup but the pharmacist wouldn't sell her it as she didn't know what meds I'm on. I'm pretty used to this so I know I don't need to see a doctor at the moment.
How long have you had it?
Jaquaia
05-06-19, 09:43 PM
A few days though J says I've been coughing a while now.
Remember though that you are immunosuppressed and so maybe it might pay to go and get looked at?
Jaquaia
05-06-19, 09:58 PM
I've told J that I will speak to the pharmacist
Do that tomorrow, please, and make a doctors appointment if the pharmacist can’t help?
Jaquaia
05-06-19, 11:20 PM
I will. I have blood tests tomorrow so will do it then
Morning hunni, how's you?
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 08:20 AM
Snotty!!!
Sorry but you did ask (giggle)
Lol.... Up vitamin C? Brand name Ribena, orange juice etc....
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 11:09 AM
Ribena??? :x I'd rather chew my right hand off.
I've got some cough medicine and menthol sweets.
I (swear)(swear)(swear)(swear)ed up on my driving lesson. We had a drive out to the seaside and I was driving at speed but I messed up when I got back to Hull :(
Hunni, we all make mistakes when we’re driving, even years/decades after passing our tests
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 11:29 AM
I got so frustrated with myself that I ended the lesson in tears. I was comfortably driving at 40/50/55mph but city driving completely threw me despite doing it all the time. Bob put it down to speed deceives and that now I've experienced it I'll be more aware next time
You’re human, please don’t beat yourself up ....
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 11:34 AM
I talked that through with Bob too, he said I need to not let the negatives outweigh the positives of my lesson. And I'm trying very hard not to do that. J has said that the sort of driving I did today can be very tiring and it was maybe tiredness setting in amd has told me that I have to rest now.
We all f*** up! Don't be too cross with yourself, you are only human love...
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 12:04 PM
I'm so used to beating myself up before anyone else can that it's taking a huge effort not to. Going to cross-stitch this afternoon
Being any kinder to yourself yet? ;) Oh and isn't it time you had a drink?
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 02:16 PM
I am being. AND I have a drink. Actually sat doing my nails as I'd broken a couple.
OldMike
06-06-19, 04:29 PM
I got so frustrated with myself that I ended the lesson in tears. I was comfortably driving at 40/50/55mph but city driving completely threw me despite doing it all the time. Bob put it down to speed deceives and that now I've experienced it I'll be more aware next time
You're doing very well with your driving Jaq, I imagine city driving can be difficult I'm sure you'll find it easier as time goes by.
How's the rest of the day gone love?
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 08:48 PM
I've not done much, felt exhausted
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 08:57 PM
Pretty much! Helped put the shopping away, dished out tea, tested the water in my dads tanks...
Doesn’t sound like resting to me ......
Jaquaia
06-06-19, 09:11 PM
I'm resting now. Coughing a lot but resting.
How are you today? Will you get checked out today?
Jaquaia
07-06-19, 08:56 AM
I'm heading to York today! On my own!!! Leaving in a little under an hour to catch the train. Meeting J for lunch, then we're out for tea and going to see The Bluetones tonight!!!
Hope you're having a brilliant time!
Jaquaia
07-06-19, 03:15 PM
I'm currently sat in the cafe reading Terry Pratchett while I wait for J to finish. Then pizza express for tea :)
Jaquaia
07-06-19, 06:54 PM
Loving it. Just waiting for the doors to open for The Bluetones as York is a bit soggy at the moment!
This gives me a smile :) enjoy the music and great compagny.
Hope you're having a blimmin brilliant time!
Jaquaia
08-06-19, 08:10 AM
Absolutely amazing night!!! We were right at the front, so an amazing view!!! The Bluetones were amazing and MARK MORRISS SPOKE TO ME!!!! No idea what he bloody said but he spoke to me a couple of times (inlove)
So glad you had fun! You would never have done this a year ago :)
Jaquaia
08-06-19, 09:19 AM
Since May last year I've been to 6 live music events (ok, 5 of them were for the same 2 bands but I really love the Stereophonics and the Bluetones!!!). It's got progressively easier, even physically! Last night was almost identical to our first proper date (apart from the rain). Last year I struggled to walk to the Pizza Express as my back really hurt and I needed to stop a couple of times. This year I had some discomfort in my hip but managed it with no real issue. Last year I didn't want to get too near the front in case I felt claustrophobic, this year I was straight to the front. Last year I struggled to stand as my hip and back hurt so much. No such problems this year. Last night really hammered home just how far I've come:)
Wow! You've come so far! You're amazing!
Jaquaia
08-06-19, 09:42 AM
I wouldn't go that far!!! J noticed how much easier I found the walking this year too!
I would say amazing - oh look I just have - twice!
Jaquaia
08-06-19, 10:16 AM
(giggle)
Awesome! (Just for a different adjective) ;)
Jaquaia
08-06-19, 02:45 PM
I'm resting. Reading "Thief of Time" by Terry Pratchett.
Jaquaia
08-06-19, 06:47 PM
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10156069783345957&id=107883525956&fs=1&focus_composer=0
You can see me in some of those photos!!!
That's soooooo cool! Spotted you! :)
Jaquaia
08-06-19, 10:20 PM
https://youtu.be/ZgtCyS7l9E0
Video has some swearing
I want to go again. Mark Morriss is an incredibly talented songwriter and has a unique voice. He's so energetic on stage and really interacts with the audience, he even made up a song on the spot about shampoo!!! (giggle) Scott's voice complements his perfectly. Adam is an incredible guitarist and Eds is brilliant! Richie was awesome too. They should have been so much bigger than they were.
Jaquaia
10-06-19, 08:55 PM
It's that time of year again... find someone to verify my identity with the Student Loan Company (bandit)
Hate this bit.
Jaquaia
10-06-19, 09:03 PM
There's a long list of criteria they need to fulfil just to be able to sign it. It's a pain. It usually means posting it away to a friend
Jaquaia
11-06-19, 03:30 PM
It's a pain but has to be done. All sorted though, the form just has to go to Darlington via Manchester...
So far, today has been lunch with J, and currently sat reading Jane Eyre while he has counselling. His mum is ill so I don't get to keep him tonight as he's got T
Hope his mum gets better soon.
Hope it's been a good day lovely.
Jaquaia
13-06-19, 11:11 AM
Took me ages to settle down today for some reason, the rain had me on edge which probably contributed a lot. I've never driven in proper rain before, just a light drizzle so today was fairly new. Even got up to 4th gear, never done that in a city before. My approach to roundabouts improved as the lesson went on too. Positive overall really!
magie06
13-06-19, 01:36 PM
I was beginning to worry about you. I haven't seen you in a while. I'm so glad that you got on so well with the driving. It makes you so much more independent when you can get behind the wheel and take off. Any sign of a test yet?
Jaquaia
13-06-19, 01:50 PM
I'm a long way off yet but pretty much independent. Last week was my first time reversing, in 4th gear, driving above 30mph and driving home. I'm getting there slowly though
Actually it sounds like you're coming on leaps and bounds now you're with an instructor who cares!
The feeling I have is that you are going to be a great driver. You have a good teacher and you will get this. Your taking your time and thats perfect. Doing it in your own pace has great value.
Jaquaia
13-06-19, 04:51 PM
I mentioned that the rain had me on edge and he just automatically started talking everything through logically. That really helps.
Still not 100% so been sat doing some cross-stitch.
https://www.dropbox.com/s/gpybwsv7p3w83mf/20190613_160202.jpg?raw=1
Jaquaia
13-06-19, 07:23 PM
I had a sarcastic comment from my mum about having it finished in 3 years...
I've had some very sarcastic comments from my mum.... Laugh it off, or just reply it's better than she is doing.....
Jaquaia
13-06-19, 08:00 PM
All I get is "I'm only having a laugh with you" as if it's my fault for not having a sense of humour
All I get is "I'm only having a laugh with you" as if it's my fault for not having a sense of humour
Now that comment I get a lot in my house. I get it, hunni.
That’s a great start on the cross stitch. Do you find it restful?
Jaquaia
13-06-19, 08:28 PM
I do. I'm not even finding it stressful when I knot the thread or lose where I am on the pattern
Well I love jokes and funny comments. But this is not funny. I am proud that you are doing this. How long it might take is not an issue at all. Your lessons. Your pace.
And how awesome that cross stitch is restful :)
All I get is "I'm only having a laugh with you" as if it's my fault for not having a sense of humour
I get it too....... (bear)(bear)
Strugglingmum
13-06-19, 10:16 PM
All I get is "I'm only having a laugh with you" as if it's my fault for not having a sense of humour
I get it too. Or, stop being so over-sensitive. (bear)
magie06
13-06-19, 11:09 PM
I got that a lot when I lived at home. Now, Gerry and I have a very similar sense of humour, so normally what he finds funny, I do too and vice versa. It will be the same when you move in with J.
OldMike
14-06-19, 08:40 AM
I had a sarcastic comment from my mum about having it finished in 3 years...
It's not just what is said but the way it is said, some people can say something and it just comes across as downright nasty as though they are putting you down, others can say the very same thing but with a glint in their eye and a cheeky grin and you know instantly they're just having a bit of fun with you.
How are you today lovely?
Jaquaia
14-06-19, 09:33 AM
Tired. I was going to start the washing today but haven't even found the energy to get up yet
(panda)(bear) Hope you're OK love
Jaquaia
14-06-19, 12:22 PM
I sometimes forget that fatigue is a symptom of RA so going to take it easy today and probably cross stitch
Good for you! Self care is important.
Jaquaia
15-06-19, 03:09 PM
I feel like I'm wading through treacle today. Everything feels like such a huge effort. My mums commented that I look pale too. I am trying to rest though.
OldMike
15-06-19, 03:11 PM
(bear) (panda)
We all have days like this. Try to rest and do something nice for yourself (panda)
(bear) Lovely... Do what you can to be kind to you today....
Jaquaia
15-06-19, 05:43 PM
I've bough my dad some plants for his aquarium for fathers day so helped him place them, and done 2 loads of washing. This evening is either tv or Jane Eyre
(panda) how are you feeling now?
Jaquaia
15-06-19, 06:58 PM
Overwhelmed... it's been far too peoplely and my parents have been out most of the day...
Jaquaia
15-06-19, 07:06 PM
That's the plan
Jaquaia
15-06-19, 10:15 PM
I've read a little and been watching Graham Norton clips
How are you this morning?
Jaquaia
16-06-19, 10:38 AM
Still feel like I'm wading through treacle. But I've put a wash on and have hoovered through downstairs. Just come up to shower and walking upstairs felt like a huge effort. But going to cross stitch or read between washes and J is planning to pop down before work as he doesn't think she'll bother about fathers day.
It's good that you are going to pace today lovely...
Wading through treacle def sums up getting through the day. Everything feels like such an effort with mental health. I think that's why people say "mind over matter" because there's an acknowledgement that our mind is the most important aspect to our wellbeing. I read an analogy that refers to the mind as a computer like how a hard drive gets filled with clutter in the background that can't so easily be removed. It slows down a computer like how negative thoughts can slow down our minds over time. It's like our brain chemistry has become untangled over the years & we need somethin to manage it (like an antivirus with a computer for instance). Random I know (blush).
Jaquaia
16-06-19, 12:21 PM
I have RA. Fatigue is something I suffer with a lot with that. It will pass in a few days, it usually does :)
I’m very impressed that you’re recognising that this is a symptom of RA and not beating yourself up over it
Jaquaia
16-06-19, 03:09 PM
I've still finished the washing. Probably shouldn't have but it needs doing.
Apart from that are you being kind to yourself?
Jaquaia
16-06-19, 06:50 PM
Trying. I'm either going to read or watch TV tonight
I hope you're resting....
Jaquaia
16-06-19, 09:11 PM
I cooked cherry and almond tart and custard (from frozen. The tart that is, not the custard...) I'm going to fill my water bottle up and go settle down with my book though.
Hi, lovely, how are you doing?
Morning gorgeous, what's on today's agenda?
Jaquaia
17-06-19, 10:51 AM
I'm tired. I was awake at 5am and couldn't get back to sleep. Managed to doze off about half 8 and the gardener woke me up. So not planning on doing very much today. Maybe some cross-stitch
Be kind to you lovely. Can you have a nap during the day if you need to?
Jaquaia
17-06-19, 02:04 PM
I can, going to just lay and read I think, really enjoying Jane Eyre at the moment
Jaquaia
17-06-19, 02:40 PM
Just found out my cousin has died. She died last Monday but her own family have only just found out. Part of me feels bad that I don't feel sad but I never really knew her. I wouldn't have a clue what she looked like.
Jaquaia
17-06-19, 03:50 PM
From that side of the family I've only ever had contact with the middle two. Not really bothered about her brother, which sounds harsh, I know, but I have my reasons. It's her sister I really feel for. She cares for her dad who has leukaemia, her youngest daughter has neurofibromatosis, and her husband has lung cancer and maybe a year left. I may not be close to her but I admire her strength so much.
Sorry for your family’s loss, hunni
Jaquaia
17-06-19, 08:30 PM
Reading Jane Eyre. Not done anything since tea really.
Reading Jane Eyre. Not done anything since tea really.
I watched the Michael Fassbender film yesterday (I’ve read the book dozens of times but this adaptation comes closer to the book than any others imo). To me, this is way more romantic and beautiful than Wuthering Heights
Jaquaia
17-06-19, 09:25 PM
I need to watch it. I tried Wuthering Heights but struggled to read it until I'd watched the Tom Hardy adaptation. I liked it but haven't read it in years. Really enjoying Jane Eyre though. I have The Tenant of Wildfell Hall somewhere too.
Morning, love, how are you?
Jaquaia
18-06-19, 10:34 AM
Tired. But need to push through. J is coming to get me soon and we're going out for pizza.
Thats something nice to look forward to. You can get through the day being tired. Enjoy your man and pizza. In whatever order you like :)
Enjoy your man and pizza. In whatever order you like :)
That made me smile! Have fun Jaq and J :)
Jaquaia
18-06-19, 03:43 PM
I forgot to mentiom, my new niece or nephew is due the 20th December
Jaquaia
18-06-19, 07:11 PM
So so. Pretty much prepared for it to be rammed down my throat for the next 6 months...
(panda)(bear) I wish I could take the pain away....
Jaquaia
18-06-19, 09:28 PM
It's just something I have to live with
You might have to live with it, but it doesn't stop me wishing I could take your pain away....
How's you this morning love?
Jaquaia
19-06-19, 08:46 AM
I'm ok. I got to wake up next to J so that's always good :)
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